


till the tired heart shall cease to palpitate

by kukunamuniu (Hekseri)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Frostiron Bang 2015, M/M, Major Character Injury, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 20:01:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 38,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5218955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hekseri/pseuds/kukunamuniu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Tony got kicked out of SHIELD he thought that was it, there was no way he would ever get his job back. But he had been wrong, because when an android of a very wealthy and powerful man goes insane and attacks his owner Tony gets a call from Fury.<br/>An android unlike any other he has ever chased, a powerful family secret, and the ticking clock make up for a case that will completely change his life.<br/>Blade Runner AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	till the tired heart shall cease to palpitate

**Author's Note:**

> First things first:  
> Big thanks to my artist [valsadoinferno](http://valsadoinferno.tumblr.com/) for creating beautiful art for this fic  
> and wonderful beta [Kaz](http://mountperdition.tumblr.com/) who suffered through my last minute writing and struggles with the english language.  
> You're both amazing, thank you so much for helping me write this.
> 
> Before you read!  
> 1\. You don't have to be familiar with the Blade Runner to able to followe the plot.  
> 2\. Tony is not a Stark. If you’re not familiar with that plot twist you can:  
> a) Read Iron Man v5 (the whole run or just issue 17)  
> b) Read about it [on marvel wiki ](http://marvel.wikia.com/wiki/Anthony_Stark_\(Earth-616\)/Expanded_History)  
> c) I’m not taking anything else from that story so all you have to know is that Tony is not Howard and Maria Stark’s son. Their real son is named Arno, he’s very sick and has to breath via an artificial lung.
> 
>  
> 
> [Link to art](http://valsadoinferno.tumblr.com/post/133303699216/this-is-my-art-to-the-fic-till-the-tired-heart)

The streets were empty, or as empty as they ever could be, and he could finally breathe. All that.... noise got on his nerves, every time he had to go to the active part of town. His skin was itching and crawling, his ears were ringing. And he was parched. He should've brought something with him on this little trip. He staggered a bit and had to catch himself on a wall. It wasn't too far, twenty minutes or so and he’d have all the booze he wanted. He just had to walk a little more and he would get home soon enough. And then he would finally go to sleep. He regained his balance and walked on, flexing his gauntleted hand a bit, the quiet clanking of metal pieces made him feel secure. There was no way he'd lose the precious parts he was carrying in his backpack. It had cost him too much money and too much trouble. And there were too many people he had had to deal with.

 _Tony, you're turning into a hermit,_ said a worried voice a long time ago, back when life was much more complicated.

"Shut up, Rhodey." 

He didn't need anyone's good advice. 

_How would I even know if you died in there some day?_

Tony traced a vein on his neck and snorted. Soon enough. Maybe sooner if he gave up that disgusting green goo he drank. Chlorophyll, who would have thought it was so disguisting? But hey, everything to stay alive a little bit longer. He shook his head and turned into a secluded street that led to the parking of the abandoned hotel where he lived. After the big wave of off Earth migration about sixty years earlier, majority of the cities moved their centers. And with population getting rapidly smaller little gems like this were abandoned to turn into ruin. At least it left Tony with a nice place to live, so he couldn’t say he was too sad about it. 

He zigzagged between heaps of trash and got to the door. Whistling to himself he punched in the code and scanned his fingerprint. The familiar clank and beep greeted him when he walked in. "Good morning, sir." 

"Morning? Is it morning already?" He patted Dummy's 'head' and bumped Butter Fingers' awkward metallic fist. 

"It's 05:32, and you were out for eleven hours."

"Huh, must have stayed at Benny's longer than I thought. You got anything for me, J?" He punched the button in the elevator and leaned heavily on the wall.

"Nicholas Fury called soon after you left, sir."

"Fury?" he frowned in confusion. "And what did he want?"

"He refused to tell me, sir."

Tony sighed. "Figures." He tossed his backpack at the nearest bench and sat on a chair in front of a giant screen. "All right, ring him up, let's see what that old bastard wants from me again."

He accepted a glass of chlorophyll from Butter Fingers and fiddled with a new booster for You while he waited.

"Smith, you're lucky I was already up," Fury frowned at Tony on the big screen. He looked angrier than ever, if it was even possible.

"Hello to you too, Nick! Aren't you happy to hear from me? I've heard you were rather disappointed that I wasn't able to answer your call yesterday!"

"Very. Smith, I need you to get your ass back to SHIELD, I have a job for you."

"And what happened to: Smith, there is no way you'll ever get accepted back to the force. No begging, bribing-"

"That's why it's a one-time deal. One assignment and then you can get back to whatever it is you do every day."

"How much?" he asked and sipped from his glass. Fury looked at it and made a face, but didn't ask.

"Seven hundred Chin Yen before and a thousand after. It's a good deal, Smith." 

It was a very good deal. A very, very good deal. He finished his drink and put the glass forcefully on the table. Watching Fury's eye twitch uncontrollably was a pleasure he could never deny himself. "What's got you so jumpy? Did your favorite soldier run away?"

"Everything is in the file, Smith. Just catch me this replicant and get your money, okay? This little android is already giving me a headache, don’t add your charming self to that."

"Why did you call me? What's so special about this one? What makes you willing to deal with my _erratic behavior_?"

"Guy's expensive, the owner wants him returned whole with as little damage as possible."

"They always do, tell me something new, boss."

"He's smart, he successfully eluded us for two months, he murdered half of Odin Gungnir's security detail and put the man himself in the hospital."

Tony whistled, that would certainly be one hell of an assignment.

"We have reasons to believe he's on Earth. You won't be working alone, there-"

"Fuck no. Fury, you can't make me-"

"Thousand and seven hundred Chin-Yen, Smith. And don't tell me you don't need money. You are probably squatting somewhere illegal. I don't think you want anyone looking into it, do you?"

"Fuck you Fury, fuck you."

"Read the file, let me know what you think. Be at the Hub in ten hours."

He disconnected the call and Tony was left staring at the black screen in disdain. Well, it wouldn't hurt to see what all the fuss was about. "Dummy, give me something to drink; J, show me the file."

It was the third time he watched the video of the runaway replicant's fight with Gungnir's son Thor and each viewing left him more confused than before. Everyone knew there was always a risk that a replicant would go insane or even violent. The more enhanced the crazier they got. The rage, the bloodlust of the replicant's attack on Odin was well known to Tony, he had seen hundreds of cases like that when he still worked for SHIELD But the fight with Thor... the replicant was a complete mess. He was erratic, he yelled something at Thor - the video had no audio so Tony couldn't hear what it was, but it must have been pretty important to him. And the most surprising part of the video was how he could go for the kill, he could easily put the spear right into Thor's chest but didn't. He hesitated, took a step back even. 

"J, go back and do a close-up on his face."

He looked into the replicant's indistinguishable from human eyes and wondered, "Are those tears, J? Is he crying?" 

"I believe so, sir."

"But why?"

"Usually crying is a sign of an overwhelming emotion," replied J in his monotone voice.

Tony watched the video again and followed the replicant's movement intently. He was shaking, his chest was heaving. He screamed into Thor's confused face and fought with much less skill than when he killed Odin's bodyguards. There he was furious but graceful, his moves were sure and powerful. But when faced with Thor... it was a fit. He was throwing a fit, a messy, violent, crying fit. 

"Stop. J, run a lip-reading program. What is he saying here?"

"The most probable and correct grammatically and semantically version is: _don't you remember me, brother_?"

"Brother?" What the actual fuck was going on? Well, it looked like he was going to take Fury’s offer after all.

* * *

The whole thing was a bad idea. First, they refused to let him into the Hub through the employees only entrance. Clark (guy who worked in security and used to be Tony's regular companion in the trips to the bar on the opposite side of the street) laughed in his face and shut him off with a stern "No" when he told him about Fury's offer. "I'll let you in when I see a laminate. Now get out of here, Tony, I received strict orders when you were kicked out, under no reason we are to let you in. Let it go man, you're a smart guy, find another job. Don't make me lose mine." So he had to use one for visitors where he was scanned, thoroughly probed and asked too many questions about his arc reactor which he refused to answer as always. Agent May tried her best to intimidate him, and to be honest she was doing a really good job of it, but that particular piece of information would not leave the confines of his head even under torture. 

And after he had suffered through all of that there was the team. The team. God damn it. Romanova, of course, had known about him joining the team, she greeted him with a simple "Smith," and a nod and got back to whatever it was she had been doing on her StarkPad. Barton on the other hand... The son of a bitch almost fell off his chair in surprise.

"Smith! What the hell are you doing here? Nat!" he looked at Natasha accusingly, "Why haven't you told me he'll be working with us!"

"Fury wasn't sure he would show up," she said without looking up from her StarkPad. 

Never mind her, it's not like they have ever got along. Tony smiled widely at Barton and spread his arms. "Well here I am! Your asses are saved."

"I can't believe Fury hired you again. And on a Stark case for that matter. They really want that replicant back, don't they?"

"It's not a Stark case, Clint. Odin Gungnir is our customer, it's his property and he is the one paying."

Barton snorted in response and sat up properly. "So. How is life?"

Oh, hell no. Not going there. No, sir. Tony turned towards the other people in the room with a smile plastered to his face and approached one of them with an outstretched hand. "Tony Smith, don't believe anything Barton said about me, he's a tool."

The man laughed and shook his hand "Steve Rogers. I'll keep an open mind."

Would you look at that? Steve Rogers. The Steve Rogers. Huh. Pity Rhodey won't hear who Tony was rubbing shoulders with. 

"Doctor Banner, so nice to meet you, big fan of your work. Or should I say agent Banner? Which one are you more proud of?" 

Banner raised his eyebrows and smiled weakly. "Really? Aren't you supposed to be a mechanics guy?"

"I have varied interests. But you've disappeared lately from the scene, may I ask what happened?"

"Family... problems," he said awkwardly and opened his mouth to speak again but Romanova interrupted him. "How about we get to work? As you can see it's a top priority case, even the old rejects get called back from their banishment."

"Do you think Fury's gonna fire him again?"

"Wait, what? I thought you were joking with that whole fired thing," said a baffled Steve Rogers and Barton laughed so hard he almost fell out of his chair again. 

Tony sent him and Romanova a wry smile and turned towards Rogers. "Disagreements happen, nothing new about it. But we're adults, so we get passed that and become better people. Now, I understand I am to start looking for our fugitive, where is my-"

"I'll show you. Doctor Banner would you-"

"Sure, yeah," the man sprang from his chair and trotted after Tony and Romanova. Tony glanced at him curiously, which made Romanova try to distract him with small talk. Interesting. He pretended to be engaged in description of his ideas for tracking code him and Banner were going to write. Both agents seemed to relax a bit at that. Huh.

Three hours later Steve Rogers barged into the workshop and threw a file at Tony's head. "Is that true?"

"Probably." Tony massaged the hurting spot on his forehead with one hand and continued to make corrections to the code on his StarkPad.

"Are you seriou-" Rogers got in his face and then immediately stepped back. "Are you high?"

"Absolutely."

Rogers made a put upon sigh and rounded on Romanova who had been hanging out in the back of the room the whole time. "Did you know about this? Does Fury really think I'm going to work with this guy?"

"Fury expects you to do whatever it is necessary to stop an insane android, Steve-"

"He killed Stane!"

"Woah. You," Tony poked Rogers in the chest in a show of far-away-from-sober courage, "have no proof. I was exonerated." 

Rogers slapped his hand off and bellowed so loud Tony winced, or maybe it was just the proximity. "Everyone knows it was you! I can't believe-"

"Hey, hey!" Banner somehow managed to get between them and force each to take a step back. Impressive show of... spirit. "Steve, there was no conviction, for all we know Mr Smith is innocent. Mr Smith-"

"Tony."

"Tony, I think it would be best if you went to sleep or… something."

Tony snorted and waved it off, "Don't need it. I'll just get back to what I was doing. With your permission of course, Captain Justice."

"And what exactly were you doing, Smith?" Romanova inquired in an unaffected voice before Rogers decided whether to yell at him or strangle him.

"Crosswords." He took his tablet and moved to the other side of the workshop to sit down. Meanwhile Rogers glared holes in his back, probably imagining all the ways in which he could avenge Stane's unfortunate demise.

"Steve-"

"Natasha, don't. Does Fury really expect me to work with a known murderer?" It must have been all he had to say because after a minute of tense silence he stormed off.

"They were friends, you know," said Romanova after some time.

"Yeah, I gathered."

* * *

Music and laughter. Quiet, almost nonexistent hum of expensive vehicles dropping off guests, polite small talk. _Mets are going to win the championship, I bet my new Palmer Johnson on that. I don't know Ted, I think you might lose this year. What a wonderful evening we have don't you think?_ Oh, how he hated it. It was all so familiar, he almost heard the echo of the grand ballrooms, the rustle of fabric, everlasting murmur of people around, the feeling of being surrounded by the living, colorful sea of voices and fabric, of painted faces and - he shook his head chasing the thoughts away. It was not the time to ponder over that. He had something of importance to do today and drowning in his own thoughts would put an end to his plans. 

He left the shadow when a breeze swept a lady's hat from her head making it fly in his direction. For a moment he was seeing another hat fly through the air, a weathered, bent a little bit out of shape, older hat, and it was a cold day, the tips of three of fingers were freezing and he couldn't feel his lips. He shook his head away before his best chance at entering the party without being paid special attention by the security passed and caught the hat before it fell to the ground. He trotted towards the woman and her partner. He bowed with a smile and handed her the hat.

"I believe you've lost this." 

"Oh thank you, sir!" she swept back her red hair and put the hat back on. "How do I look, Peter?"

"Stunning, as always, MJ," he smiled and pecked her on the cheek. 

"Are you heading for the Oscorp party Mr..." asked Mary Jane, politely eyeing his tux.

"Donald Blake." He shook her hand, ignoring the crawling feeling under his skin. He hoped his smile hadn't changed from charming to deranged for a moment. 

"Mary Jane Watson, and this is my fiancé, Peter Parker." 

"I'm very pleased to meet you both, and yes. I am."

"Then you should join us, we'll introduce you to the host."

To the host? Well, wasn't that a real stroke of luck? He let them lead him towards the entrance. It was going to be much easier than he thought.

"Really, you know Mr Osborn? Well, it will be my pleasure then."

"Everything for my hero," said Mary Jane with a flourish and Peter gasped in mock horror. 

"I thought I was your hero."

"Not today, somebody else did the saving this time."

They passed the security without any problems, the security guards seemed quite familiar with his companions and he was unconsciously added to the same 'not a threat' category in their eyes. Human minds were so deceivable. He kept his smile in check and pretended to be confused as he looked at Mary Jane's face. 

"Is there something wrong?"

"I'm sorry, it's just that... you look very familiar."

"Well, maybe we have met?" she teased him.

"We certainly haven't. I would never forget a face with such beautiful eyes." 

Mary Jane laughed, "Aren't you a smooth talker, Mr Blake. And speaking of beautiful eyes, I am not the only one, right Peter?"

"Sure, I mean Mr Blake, I have to say it, I hope my fiancée won't kill me, but you do have amazing eyes. Much like MJ's actually." 

It took an awful amount of self-control to pretend to be flattered, to make an off-hand joke. The ringing in his head made it almost impossible to hear the answering laughter, his rib cage hurt from suppressing a labored breath, the muscles of his face were strained so much he could feel every single one of them separately. But he wouldn't let his mask fall off. He would not lose this chance. He shook his head and covered it by pretending to laugh at his own joke. He was a pleasant, good-humored, charming man. He had just made a most amiable acquaintance and there was nothing... off about him that they could notice. 

"Anyways, you may know me from the billboards Mr Blake, you could say I am the face of Oscorp."

"Yes! The Alchemax!" he exclaimed and the outburst had surprisingly helped in getting himself in order again.

"That's right, I'm promoting the Alchemax line." 

Oh dear, what a surprise. He never would have guessed. 

He looked at the throng of people as they chattered, oblivious of what was about to happen, unaware that they would soon scream in horror. And he was going to be the reason. All those polite smiles, the self-important air they created around them would be gone in a second. He focused his gaze on one particular man, he had a larger group of admirers around him. Otto Octavius was a very successful man after all, who wouldn't admire his genius? One of the best biomechanics in the world. His designs were frequently used in the most recent series of Stark androids. And they were all supposedly _a thing of beauty_. 

He bit his lip and surveyed the room in search of security. There were only two guards; oh, it was going to be so easy. He walked down the stairs and adjusted his grip on his cane. He casually strolled to one of the security guards and hit him in the face as hard as he could, the guard made a startled sound right before the cane collided with his skull with a crunch. The bystanders gasped in shock and scrambled out of his way. He punched the next guard in the solar plexus and then in the back as he bended in half. He wouldn’t be standing up anytime soon. He strode towards his target as he tried to escape with the crowd, but there was no escaping him. He grabbed the engineer and flipped him on some kind of antique-looking stone table.

"Do you know who I am, doctor?"

The man screamed and tried to shove him off. But the synthetic muscles were designed to resist a much bigger pressure, Octavius grew more panicked when he saw that his resistance was futile.

"I have three questions for you, doctor. Morphology. Longevity. Incept dates." 

The man stilled and looked at him in shock. "Your eyes. I- I designed your eyes."

"Ah, yes. I guess it doesn't take long to recognize your own creation," he leaned close to him, so there was almost no space between their faces. Octavius started crying and the sight of his tears made him smile. Perfect, let him be afraid, let him regret.

"I- I don't know anything. I swear, I just- I just designed your eyes, please- I don't know anything"

"Who does?"

"Stark!" he shrieked. "Stark does. He designed your brain."

So he would have to somehow get to Stark after all, and he was not an easy man to get a hold of. They would probably be ready for him, for Odin's crazy replicant. But he would find a way, he would meet his maker before it was all over. "Oh doctor, if only you could see what I've seen with your eyes."

"Please, please don't hurt me. Ple-" Octavius screamed as he jammed the eyeball scanner in his eye socket. He made sure he would be the last thing Octavius was going to see as the machine drilled into his skull. The man kicked and trashed with all of his might, but Stark Industries made their androids well, there was no chance he was getting away. 

He left Octavius' body on the table and tossed the scanner aside. He turned towards the terrified crowd and grinned. The screams of terror filled the room; oh, it was so much better than laughter and music. It felt real. Tangible. He fought off some of the security guards and moved from one room to another in search of Norman Osborn. People scattered in panic as he moved between them, hid under the tables, plastered themselves to the walls, grabbed random objects as weapons, clung to each other. So pathetic. And they fancied themselves rulers of the world. Miserable greedy creatures. 

A familiar voice caught his attention and he stopped and looked around. And there she was, Mary Jane Watson, owner of beautiful green eyes. She was kneeling next to a cowering gentleman and was speaking to him in a soothing voice. The man shrieked when he approached them and started crawling on his back as quickly as he could. For a moment he watched the man with a smile on his face and it made the fool panic even more. 

"Ms Mary Jane Watson, fancy meeting you here." 

"Mr Blake," she stood up and met his eyes defiantly. It made his skin crawl, but there was something else he had to do before he could... scratch that particular itch.

"Would you be so kind and lead me to where Mr Osborn is hiding?" 

"No." 

"Come now, Ms Watson. There's no need to be so rude." She stepped back as he moved towards her and he smiled wider. That was more like it. 

He took another step forward and leaned in. 

"Oh hell no!" someone yelled from behind him and a moment later something crashed into him. He got onto his feet and faced his opponent. It was a man dressed in a red and blue costume. "It's really impolite to harass a lady like that. You sir, should know that no means no." 

That impudent imbecile- Before he even finished speaking Loki grabbed his cane and swung it at the intruder’s head, but his opponent managed to dodge it. Huh. He tried again, this time aiming at his solar plexus and in the last moment changed the direction and hit lower, in his midriff. The stranger toppled backwards and landed on all fours, heaving loudly. He wasted no time, he moved in quickly, aiming for a quick blow to the spine when suddenly something covered his eyes and everything went white. 

"Upps, sorry about that, man." 

He still tried to hit his mark but missed. He touched his face with his free hand. What in the world was that? It was some sort of sticky goo. He tried to pry it off, but with no success. Loki heard the man breathe next to him right before he punched at Loki. He wasted no time on recovery and made a blind stab at the space from where the hit had come from. The masked man groaned in pain so he gave up on trying to get rid of the substance covering his eyes and followed the blow with another. He missed. He tried again and missed again.

"Oh man, you must have sucked at hitting piñatas." He gritted his teeth and tried again, this time in completely different direction. He managed to land a hit, but his opponent grabbed his cane and made him lose his balance. He roared in fury. He would not let some _human_ humiliate him like this. He took a deep measured breath and let the white noise silence every other thought. 

And all of a sudden he wasn't lost anymore. He knew exactly what to do. He widened his stance and adjusted his grip on his cane. He listened and waited for the next blow. And right there between waves hitting the rocky shore and old creaking floorboards were light footsteps of his opponent. This time when the assault came he was ready, he gripped the man's wrist and twisted. He was rewarded with a most beautiful cry of pain. The next move was instinctual. He held the man in place and drove the tip of his cane right into his solar plexus. The masked man fell to the ground with a thump. He kicked him between the ribs and then, satisfied with the answering sounds, took a moment to pry the strange substance off his eyes. 

He blinked a few times and adjusted to the brightness. The man at his feet tried to crawl away but he stepped on one of his hands. Then he turned the man onto his back and tipped his head back with his cane. 

"And why are you so silent all of a sudden? Are you not having fun?"

"No, not really," the man croaked.

"Well, I guess I'm having enough for both of us."

"Ha. Good for you." 

"I suppose it's time to end this. I've wasted far too much time on you."

And once again, just as he was about to smash the fool's head with his cane something rammed into his back and sent him rolling on the marble floors. He scrambled upright and surveyed the room. There was a man with a shield standing on the opposite side of the room and he knew exactly who that was. 

"Does Odin want me back that bad?"

"You are his property and I'm here to collect you."

"Oh, Captain, I'm so honored."

"Don't be."

Rogers drew out his gun and fired, but he was ready for it. He dodged the blast with ease and grabbed one of the remaining bystanders by the neck and squeezed. The man made a pitiful yelp but wisely kept quiet. Rogers eyed him warily and touched his earpiece. "Stand down, he's got a hostage."

Quiet metallic clicking made him turn around. Behind him was standing a rather short man, dressed, unlike Captain Rogers who was wearing the standard SHIELD uniform, in a hoodie and a pair of jeans. His hands were outstretched and on his right hand he was wearing a gauntlet with a round power source in the middle of his palm. In his other hand the man had a pistol and it was aimed right at the middle of his chest. Next to him stood Agent Barton. 

"Captain, would you please tell Agent Barton that if he tries to shoot me in the back I will manage to crush this man's windpipe before I die," He slowly moved backwards, eyes trained on the mysterious man. He had faces of all SHIELD agent's imprinted in his mind and his face wasn't among them. He was undoubtedly working with Rogers' team, but SHIELD didn't work with vigilantes. "Who is your new friend, Rogers?" 

"I wouldn't call us friends, exactly" said the man with a wry smile. "You see, you have to be rich and powerful to earn the status of good Captain's friend."

"Smith I don't think-" Rogers began saying, but had no chance to finish because Loki smashed his elbow right into his jaw. He tossed the hostage aside and grabbed the Captain's rifle. He shot at Barton and missed, but the debris falling on his head excluded him from the fight for the time being. He dodged the blast fired by Smith, but missed the moment when Rogers pulled himself together. The Captain tackled him to the ground and punched him in the face. Something broke and a thick fluid filled up his mouth. He spit it in Rogers' face and threw him off. 

"Romanova, get in here right now! Barton, do you copy?" 

A flaring pain erupted at his back and fell to his knees. He turned abruptly and ducked out of the way of another blast. Before any of the men could realize, he grabbed a sharp piece of metal that must have been a piece of ornament once upon a time and thrust it right into the Captain's abdomen, pushed it up and twisted. Then he gripped his arms and threw him right at the approaching Smith. He snatched the discarded rifle and started running. 

The halls were empty, the rest of the guests cleared out long ago. He shot two agents that stood in his way and turned left instead of going towards the exit. They would be waiting for him there. But it turned out there was someone who had anticipated his move. She stepped out of the corner and shoved him into a wall so quickly he had no time to react. She kicked him in the stomach and he answered by head butting her in the nose. Her grip on him loosened. He tried to turn her around and shove her on the opposite wall but she sidestepped him. She punched him in the abdomen and pushed him against a wall.

Romanova was reaching to her pocket when a familiar voice bellowed, "Where is he?" 

She frowned and turned her head towards the voice. It was all the distraction he needed. He grabbed her by the neck and slammed her head against the wall. Her eyes rolled back and she slumped down. 

"Where are you, Loki?" yelled Thor.

"I've been waiting for you, brother," he said when Thor finally found him standing over Romanova's unconscious body.

"Loki, stop this madness. You will not win."

"And why not?"

"Because I will stop you."

Loki chuckled and shook his head fondly. "Oh Thor, you truly are the most naive fool that has ever lived. There is no stopping me. I will get what I want."

"And what is it that you want?" 

"Revenge."

"I will not let you kill my father."

"Our father, Thor. Our father." 

Thor shuffled on his feet awkwardly and sighed. "I have no idea where this absurd idea came from. Loki, you and I are not brothers. You are not a-"

"A person?!" he cried. "If I am not then what am I? I'm not-" he struggled for breath for a moment, tears clouding his vision. Thor looked at him bewildered and unmoved. "I'm not a _machine_. I- I- I _feel_ so much. And I just can't- you can't make me..." he roared and charged at Thor. His whole body felt as if it were on fire, his heart was pounding, and his head was filled with so many voices he had no idea which one was his. Or maybe all of them were? Thor fended off his blows but made no attack of his own. He looked at him with so much pity... "I am going to kill you," Loki sneered right into Thor's face, "I am going to find everything that's dear to you and destroy it."

"I won't let you."

"You cannot stop me, no one can."

Then he grabbed his rifle from where it had fallen during his skirmish with Romanova and shot his brother in the chest. Thor fell down with a cry and Loki turned around and started running. Without stopping he ran straight into the window and jumped. 

* * *

"Play it again." Bruce groaned, but did as Tony asked. It had been four hours after they returned that Barton was released from medical ward and they could get to work. Barton was okay. Bruised and tired, but okay. Rogers on the other hand... he was still being operated, but thanks to all the enhancers he had implanted in his body during all the years he had been a poster boy for Weapon X, he had a big chance at getting through this. Meanwhile the rest of the team was sitting in Tony's and Bruce's workshop, watching the footage from the attack and waiting for Thor Gungnir's debriefing to finally come to an end. He’d been snatched away by Fury right after medical ward had released him. He had a lot of luck, the gun the replicant had shot him with was barely charged. It only bruised his ribs, gave him a mild second-degree burn, and ruined his protective armor. 

"I think I'm gonna be sick if I watch it one more time," whined Barton from the back of the room. He was sitting slumped in his chair, his left hand in a sling, stitches here and there, his uniform switched to more comfortable, civilian clothes. 

"Then go home or something." 

"Fuck no. I wanna see what Gungnir has to say about this whole thing."

"You can find out tomorrow. It is really late, and you've been seriously injured. Go sleep it off," said Bruce as they watched the replicant ditch the people with whom he walked in, Mary Jane Watson and Peter Parker. During their interview they stated that they had met 'Mr. Donald Blake' just outside the building. Tony was sure there was no coincidence as to why it was them who had been fortunate enough to meet the replicant, but he had no idea what the reason was. If all he had wanted was to kill Norman Osborn and Otto Octavius, he should have stuck with the pair, first kill Osborn and then find Octavius. It just... didn't add up. 

"Can't, have to stay awake for some time, concussion. So can we please give this video a rest? Smith, seriously."

"Let me do my job, Barton, go shoot something, pester Coulson, help Romanova interview the witnesses, I don't know." 

Barton huffed in annoyance and left the room. Meanwhile on the screen the replicant grabbed Dr. Octavius and threw him on a table. "Slow down this bit, he's saying something here."

"Tony, we already tried this, you can't see his face, there's no sound, no reflection, and we still haven't found who was there at the moment." 

"Yeah, I know. Did Gungnir send us the file we asked for three days ago?" Bruce shook his head, "Stark Industries? No? Do we even know what model he is? Anything?"

"Nothing. Odin wasn't very forthcoming with information."

"Does he even know that's a crime? Because it's not a simple replicant retrieval case anymore."

"I'm afraid he doesn't give a damn. And you know that there's nothing we can do about it. It's Odin Gungnir, he has everyone in his pocket. If he doesn't want to give us the file then he won't."

Tony gritted his teeth and watched as the replicant was drilling right into Octavius' head with an eye scanner. After seeing this seven times it kinda stopped being so revolting. "Why kill him like this, though?" The replicant on the screen straightened up and faced the terrified crowd. The sight of him still made shivers go down Tony's spine. His face, neck, and torso were splattered with Otto's blood. He had that crazed smile plastered on his face, his eyes jumped from person to person. Watching him was one of the most upsetting things Tony had ever done. 

Tony couldn’t stop wondering what the logic was behind the replicant's actions. What was his reasoning? Tony was sure there was some kind of thought behind the android's actions, he didn't act like a kind of person who would do things without thinking them through. So what was so special about Mary Jane Watson? Tony watched as she bravely stood up to a homicidal machine with nothing to protect herself with, and couldn't help but wonder where the hell her fiancé was at that time. According to Parker's statement they separated during the party and when all hell broke loose he tried to find her but wasn't able too. But this explanation didn't sit right with Tony, and the rest of the team for that matter, but they assumed he just ran and was ashamed to admit it. But Peter Parker didn't strike him as a kind of person to ditch his fiancée to save his ass. Thankfully, Spider-man showed up before anything bad happened to Mary Jane. Big help or not, the guy was lucky he managed to scrape himself up and escape before SHIELD got their hands on him. That would have gotten ugly and Tony kind of had a soft spot for the guy. He was doing good work, whether all high and mighty agreed with that or not. He might have been a menace for the upper classes, but for the lower ones - those who didn't get into the Cities - he was a hero. Even if a little bit a weird one. 

There was also something strange about the fight between Spider-man and the replicant. At first it looked like the android had been getting his ass handled to him: in his fighting he relied on his strength and the element of surprise, and those two things didn't seem to be enough in a fight with Spider-man. The replicant was visibly and rapidly losing the remains of his composure, pathetically trying to land a blow on his opponent, and then it looked like something clicked in his mind. He was suddenly calm and collected, his moves were sure, his blows landed with a scary accuracy, he was _good, really good._ Elegant, even. But Tony had seen this footage seven times, and this time he drew his eyes from the android and to the surroundings. And just next to the fight there was Mary Jane, who looked panic-stricken. She was crying and screaming, while some woman was holding her back. Tony looked between her and Spider-man. And then it clicked. Oh. _Oh. Shit._

Well.... that was enlightening. But it wasn't the kind of enlightenment Tony was hoping for. He still had no idea what was so special about Mary Jane, what had made the android fixate on her so much. She was a decent actress, she was a model, she was Spider-man's fiancée, apparently, she was friends with Norman Osborn's son, she worked with Oscorp on a few project, the largest of them being the Alchemax, but it wasn't anything that would connect them. And there was some kind of connection between them, of that Tony was sure. 

Then there was the surprise. The android didn't even bat an eyelash at the sight of Rogers, he even knew who he was, but he had no idea who Tony was. He even stopped for a moment when he saw him. He frowned, like something didn't add up in his mind, like he was sure he should know who Tony was. And it wasn't exactly normal for a replicant to inquire after the identity of a Blade Runner. Everything was strange about this one. No wonder Fury had decided to bring Tony back for this case, it required a special kind of approach and Tony, while maybe not the best to work with, was really good at being a Blade Runner. It had never been his dream to become one, he hadn't even thought about it when he was a kid, but desperate times called for desperate measures, and his expertise on machines landed him a job at SHIELD and he was good at it. 

He tried not to look as the android gutted Rogers and watched for the seventh time in astonishment as he held his own against Romanova. From stumbling and brute force to graceful and precise movements. Granted, he wouldn’t have won if Romanova hadn't gotten distracted, but his movements changed drastically. What had happened? Had he suddenly remembered how to fight? Was he pretending to be hopeless at the beginning? Tony groaned and hit the table with his forehead. 

"Tony, you should stop watching this and go home, get some rest too."

"You should listen to your own advice, Bruce, what are you still doing here?"

"Working on a side project and making sure you won't stay here all night. Natasha told me you tend to do that." 

"Yeah, then Natasha should mind her own business. And now if you could be quiet for a minute, the best part is coming up."

The most confusing part of the whole event was the talk between Thor and the replicant. And when Tony thought confusing he meant completely off the rocket. Thankfully in the quiet corridor the microphones were able to pick up on what was being said by the two of them, and boy, was it one disturbing conversation. The replicant was looking at Gungnir with so much intensity it made something crawl at Tony's back. He looked at him like he was going to penetrate the inside of his head just by looking at him. And then there was the conversation. Oh boy. So the replicant somehow got into his mind that he and Thor Gungnir were brothers. And for some reason he decided that family meant trying to kill them. 

_I'm not a machine._

Well, hate to break it to you, pal, but.... 

Tony pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. _I feel so much._ This was not how androids were supposed to work. Sure thing, there was a small emotion range in the most advanced units, but they were introduced just so the androids would understand things like humor, timing, nuances of social behavior. Nothing that would make an android able to openly cry, to shake with emotion. Throw a tantrum, maybe, go violent, sure, it sometimes happened, but this. The well thought out revenge, the pain on his face... He shouldn't be feeling like this. He shouldn't be feeling at all. He was not a person after all. Not really. He's a program.

And then he didn't go for the kill despite his earlier promises. He turned and ran. 

It was stuff like this that made him waver in his theory that there was some reason and planning behind what the replicant was doing. But there had to be, it wouldn't make any sense if there weren't.

 _Loki._ That's how Thor called him. It wasn't unusual for people to give their androids a name. But there was something on his face when Thor said it. Like a piece of a puzzle just clicked. Like he was so happy the guy had used that name.

"Bruce, do you know when Fury's gonna release Gungnir from his clutches? I have some questions for him."

Meeting with Thor Gungnir was awkward as hell for some reason. Maybe it was seeing such a huge guy get so uncomfortable and defensive, maybe it was the thought of their team mate getting so close to dying because of his runaway android, or maybe it was just who Thor Gungnir was when there was no camera around. Nevertheless, the guy told them a detailed, thought-out, cohesive story about how his father had bought an android so he would have an assistant and a new butler. He told them how much of a surprise it was for his parents when Loki attacked them. And yes, Loki was his name given to him by Mr and Mrs Gungnir. No, Thor had no idea why the replicant got it into his head that they were brothers, he had never met him prior to the attack. He even had no idea his parents had bought a replicant.

"At least we know he's a decent liar," was the first thing Romanova said after Thor had left. 

"You think he's lying." 

"Oh, I know he's lying. Smith picked up on it too, right?"

Tony nodded and started skimming through Thor's file. He was perfectly okay with not being a part of this conversation. He was exhausted, irritated, and sore. He wanted to go home, his initial fascination be damned. 

"But I don't think he knows the truth," Romanova continued. Tony and Bruce looked at her in confusion. "I think he really has no idea what exactly is going on."

"So what you're saying is, he knows his father lied to him, but he still covers for him?"

"Exactly. No need to be so surprised, they're both public figures, kids who grow up in the spotlight quickly learn to hide their parents secrets, and their own too."

"So how do we find out if he really doesn't know anything?" asked Bruce and Tony felt a bit sorry for him, because he already knew what was coming, and time heals jack shit.

"We get friendly, he's our new team mate after all. And we're all friends here, right Tony?" 

He gave her a brittle smile and said, "Sure thing, Nat."

* * *

Maybe it was the feeling of bitterness that wouldn't leave the back of his throat after that last talk with Bruce and Romanova, or maybe it was Loki the replicant and the tears in his eyes, or maybe it was the game that Odin Gungnir was undoubtedly playing. Or maybe it was just his usual self, not being able to sleep even though just two hours earlier he had been barely staying awake. So he had been pacing. He had been pacing a lot. From one cluttered corner of his favorite room/workshop/one of the biggest rooms in the hotel to the other. 

"Sir, I am sorry to interrupt, but you haven't drunk your chlorophyll cocktail in 15.8 hours."

"Oh yeah. I guess I forgot about that. Looks like I'm going to bring lunch to work tomorrow."

"Shall I order Butterfingers to make you a sandwich? I'm sure we can find a lunchbox somewhere in the building."

"What about the crust?"

"Cut off with utmost precision."

"That's what I like to hear."

Tony sat down on an empty crate and rubbed the skin around his arc reactor. He had it the majority of his life, but the uncomfortable feeling of having something in his chest never disappeared. The dull ache, quiet humming, and slightly higher temperature were so familiar to him he couldn't imagine life without it, nor remember how it was like before the accident. He was such a stupid kid. Had thought there was nothing that could hurt him, but he was proven wrong when he had waited for the staff to go to sleep, dragged Rhodey out of his bed and to the Stark Mechanics Facility a few miles from the orphanage. He had been so confident, so sure he could bypass all of the security he had made a dumb mistake. One overlooked booby trap, that's all it took to change his life forever. A kid's mistake, that's what determined his whole life, that's how he got to the place he was at. 

Tony looked at the footage frozen on Loki's face as he was talking with Mary Jane and Peter. He looked so... human, his head slightly tilted, a charming smile on his face, a gleam in his eye. So unlike the furious snarl, blood all over his face, and emptiness in his eyes. Tony groaned in frustration. Everything was weird with this replicant. He was so unlike the others, he acted differently, moved differently, spoke differently. Why? How? What had happened to make him the way he was? How did he get to this point? Tony needed to know the starting point of the story. If not only to do his job, Odin considered it unnecessary to share any information with them since all they had to do was to catch and deliver the replicant to Asgard Enterprise, then for his own satisfaction, so he could scratch that particular itch in his brain. 

"J, how did this whole thing start? Why am I working for SHIELD again?"

"I believe it started with a call from Director Fury."

"All right, play it for me, would you?"

Tony turned towards the giant screen he had set up when he first moved here and watched Fury's frustrated face before something caught his attention.

 _We have reasons to believe he's on Earth._ "J, is there anything in the files that suggests how SHIELD knew Loki was on Earth? Odin lives on 8912, that's where the attack happened, no one knew he would assassinate Octavius, so how did they know?"

"It appears SHIELD has been keeping secrets, sir."

"They always do, J," Tony got up from the crate and moved towards his desk, rolling his shoulders and rubbing his neck as he went. Tomorrow he would drown himself in coffee, but now it was time to dig a little. No rest for the wicked. "Let's see what they've been hiding." 

It had taken him few hours to finally get to SHIELD's protected files, to crack the encryption and download everything they had on Odin Gungnir and his replicant. It wasn't much, just some observations Romanova and Barton had made, they noticed the same things Tony had - there was something different about this replicant. Odin's statement vaguely explained it, apparently Loki was a new prototype, not yet sent to mass production. Nothing revolutionary about him, just a few small changes. Few small changes his ass, Tony huffed as he read Gungnir's statement. The guy wasn’t even tyring to pretend he cared if they believed him or not. SHIELD wouldn’t touch him, at least not direstly, and he knew that. It became obvious to Tony why Fury had called him. Maybe SHIELD was in no position to dig into this, but Tony was, and he had both the means and will to do so.

But the real treat had been waiting for Tony in a file that explained why Loki had been classified as a _level 8 threat._ It was a video from what it looked like higher floors of the HUB. A separate, unconnected to the web, database. Tony had always known they had one, but he had never seen it, until now. Both the corridor outside and inside of the room were visible on the feed. 

In the video Loki was walking down the corridor looking like every other agent. He was dressed in a standard uniform, he was walking with a purpose, undistinguishable from every other agent. There was nothing unusual, nonhuman about him. He calmly walked up to the agents standing guard by the door and showed them his card. One of the guards scanned it and then nodded. Loki was let into the room. How had that bastard managed to get a hold of fake ID card so good it would let him in? And how had he known about the database? It wasn't common knowledge any android could just download from the net. But Tony had no time to ponder on that because just as the door closed behind him Loki grabbed one of the two guards inside and snapped his neck with his bare hands. Then quickly before the other one could sound the alarm (so quickly J had slowed down the feed to nanosecond speed so Tony could see clearly what was happening) he grabbed him by the neck and snapped it. It was a rather unimaginative style of fighting, much unlike the one he displayed while fighting Rogers. 

On the feed, Loki dropped the agent and moved towards the opposite wall, surprisingly quickly he found the hidden data probe and inserted it into his headjack. He closed his eyes as the data started streaming towards him. Tony watched as the most secure databased was being infiltrated by an android acting as if it were no big deal. No wonder Fury had put that particular team together. All of them were the best, it wasn't just Gunginr's money and influence. This replicant had downloaded a big chunk of top secret SHIELD data, no wonder Fury was a bit jittery. 

The slick bastard had had to set up some kind of countdown because just as the agents outside the door were starting to get suspicious he unplugged himself and made for the door. So just as one of them was reaching for his radio Loki stormed outside. A fight broke out between Loki and the agents during which he managed to smash both of their radios before it was too late. But he had known it wouldn't be enough, because another feed popped out next to the one Tony was watching and on this feed he could see a man- no, a replicant attack agents on the corridor leading to one of the SHIELD's dangerous objects stores. Then another window popped up, another replicant attacking agents, this time 'trying' to get into the room where valuable witnesses were usually questioned. And another window, and another, and another, and then some more. 

Tony watched in astonishment as Loki managed to blend into the crowd of agents hurrying in one direction or another after he had gotten rid of the agents guarding the database. He moved through the crowd like it was a dance to which he had memorized all of the steps and was able to perform it effortlessly. He fled the place without anyone noticing and leaving his accomplices behind. Tony turned to the other feeds when Loki had left the range of the cameras just in time to see one of the replicants being terminated. If you could call Logan cutting someone's head off a termination.

Tony switched back to Loki's upgraded file and couldn't suppress a smirk, Fury must had been shitting himself. Loki was cold-blooded (huh, cold-oiled?), driven, unpredictable, resourceful, and oh so clever. Being back at SHIELD stopped looking so bad. If Tony had the chance to catch someone like that he could suffer through painful social interaction and reluctant team work. He was going to have so much fun with this. 

* * *

Getting back to the team and working side by side with them without telling them what he had found out was surprisingly easy. He had expected there to be an itch at the back of his throat, the need to tell them, to warn them, that they had no idea what Loki could know. But there was nothing. Tony walked into their assigned 'office' (more of a conference room/workshop, if you asked Tony) expecting to fight his need to share the info, but there was nothing. Everyone sans Rogers and Gungir were there, lounging in different parts of the room, drinking coffee, skimming through the case files. He received quiet murmurs of greeting, but no one bothered him, no one inquired after his obvious exhaustion, no one had even offered him a cup too. There was something about this whole situation that irritated him to no end, so he acted in his usual way, he got obnoxious. He had managed to irritate Barton and made Bruce regret they had ever met before Thor arrived. And Tony couldn't help it if some of his... fascination with Loki reflected on the way he interacted with Thor. It was just that... he would know more if the Gungnirs had been more cooperative. And oh how he wanted to know. 

"Say Thor, why would your Father buy a replicant if he already had a full staff?"

"Heimdall has retired a few years ago and my father decided to replace him with a replicant, nothing new about this Tony," and here it was, the well-practiced response. Each time he said it he did it with less and less effort to pretend to believe it. At least Romanova's method seemed to be working, he was loosening up pretty quickly. 

"Sure there isn't. But if I recall correctly your father had been pretty vocal about his resentment towards the replicants. So what's changed?"

"Everyone is allowed to change their beliefs, Tony, even a man as pertinacious as my father," Thor had said without a moment to think about his answer and Tony had known it was a big, fat lie. Odin was not the type of man to change his mind about something so fundamental to his media image. And speaking about media... 

"So correct me if I'm wrong, but his speech at OLMA few months ago, did he have Loki then?"

Thor frowned seeing there was no good way out of the situation. "I think it would be best if you focused on your job instead of prying into things that are none of your business."

"Getting all possible data on my target is not doing my job? Are you sure you're in the right place?"

"Your job is to do what my father tells you to do."

"And that's where you're wrong, pal." Tony took a step closer to him and poked him in the chest just to rile him, and Thor did not disappoint; he slapped Tony's hand away and squared back his shoulders, the difference between them had never been so striking before. "It's not a simple retrieval case anymore, it's not even a private case anymore. This is an investigation, we are on the hunt after a dangerous, murderous replicant. And your father is withholding information. Do you know what the penalty is for that?"

Thor expression cleared and he leaned in, so he could speak directly to Tony's face, "Shall I warn my father, then? Tell him the blind lady justice is coming his way?"

Even after everything that had happened in his life Tony still felt indignation at Thor's words. That smug bastard, if he hadn't at least a hundred pounds of sheer muscle on Tony he would at least try to punch him in that self-important face. "While she may get lost on the way, the reporters certainly won't. A replicant belonging to a well-known anti-android public figure breaks loose and murders a scientist on a charity gala, stay tuned for more-"

"That's enough Tony," Romanova appeared from nowhere and pulled him back before he managed to piss off Thor even more. "Don't listen to him, Thor. He won't go to the press. He doesn't like them, they love him, it's a difficult relationship. He just likes to piss off powerful people. It never ends well for him." She looked directly into Tony's eyes while saying the last few words. The story of his life summarized into two short sentences.

"I do not think such a big team was a good idea. Fury should think about making it smaller."

"Seriously Thor, you get used to him."

"That's right, we worked together, me and Nat," Tony swung his arm across Romanova's shoulders, "at the beginning I thought she was going to snap my neck, but then she warmed up to me, came to my birthday party even, gave me a very tasteful watch. I still piss her off sometimes, but what's a bit of annoyance between friends? Right?"

Romanova rolled her eyes at him fondly and a part of him admired her skills while the rest tried very hard to not let his resentment reflect on his face, "And we should go anyway. They found one of the chief Stark Industries mechanics dead in his flat, our replicant is on the footage from the lobby," she said and playfully elbowed Tony in the stomach,or at least it looked like a playful shove. 

"Well, at least the guy isn't camera shy," Tony said through his gritted teeth. 

* * *

It soon turned out the mechanic wasn't going to be the last victim. Bodies of various Stark Industries, Oscorp, and Asgard employees were found every few days. Sometimes there was evidence it was Loki, sometimes it was another replicant, sometimes there was just a body, viciously savaged, no evidence left behind. Media picked up on the trail of murders, but they suspected some kind of human serial killer. No one breathed a word about a crazy android. Meanwhile the team scrambled to catch Loki; they caught a glimpse of him a few times. Every big corporation employee was cautious these days, many safety precautions were being made. It made their job a bit easier. But the bastard was still too slippery for them, it was as if he had the power to disappear. Like a motherfucking magician. 

Between their unsuccessful attempts to catch Loki and countless analyses of every video footage of him they could get their hands on, Tony continued aggravating Thor and being the bad cop to Romanova's good cop. And even though the guy was ridiculously loyal and not so stupid, he slowly began to cave in. There were some doubts expressed, not directly connected to the case but they were getting there. 

It all started a few days after Thor had joined their team. At first they paid no attention to the rise of minor assaults and break-ins in the enclaves, it was none of their business. Some instances where the witnesses claimed that the attacker was a replicant went to the SHIELD case load, but they were minor cases their team didn't care about. More and more androids started disappearing from their storages and the Hub got busy, there was someone walking down the hall every time of the day. But aside from raising an eyebrow Tony paid it no mind. He was too busy chasing after a ghost, watching the footage on loop and looking at Loki's face, trying to figure out what was different about him, how could that difference be created, what was he going to do next, where the hell was he. It was all pointless. The team was becoming more and more testy, snapping at each other for no reason at all (thank all the higher forces Rogers was still in the intensive care at that time) when Romanova walked in and made them all sit around the table at the front of their 'office'. 

Apparently there were some who paid attention to the world outside their case. She had been gathering intel on all of the replicant cases ever since Loki had attacked Odin. And oh boy, this case was getting bigger and bigger every day. Tony was sure there was no way of keeping this from the press much longer. Soon enough this nasty little confidence bubble would burst and the whole team was going to be in the splash zone. And he had managed to stay out of the spotlight for so long! He bit his knuckles in frustration as Romanova revealed the whole thing before them. Accepting Fury's offer was a terrible idea, and yet... he couldn't help but be glad he agreed. He hadn't felt this awake in a long time. He thought about calling Rhodey when he got back, it would be nice to see his stupid face again...

Romanova threw a pen at his face. It nearly hit him in the eye. He yelled in indignation. She made a face in response and continued talking. 

"We don't have a pattern yet, all of the incidents seem to be random, some of them probably are. But this unrest is not a coincidence. Our target is involved in this. Whether or not it is his doing, his plan that the rest follows. We need to find him. We need to find him soon. This is getting out of our hands."

"How come no one from the press has caught scent of this already?" Romanova looked at Bruce meaningfully. "Oh. I get it. Okay, so why don't you upload all of that to the system and see if Tony and I can come up with some kind of pattern."

"Forget it, Munin Raven's security alarm has been set off. It's probably him. Get there and catch me that robotic psychopath," Fury's voice rang from the speaker in the ceiling, Thor scowled at his words but he said nothing. But even his confusion about Thor's attitude towards Loki couldn't suppress his excitement. They had time, maybe this time they would catch him. Or at least see him for longer than a minute. 

So off they went. Tony had already received his SHIELD uniform and reluctantly put it on as they flew towards the Amethyst Enclave. Bruce, as the only member of the team with no combat training whatsoever stayed behind. Tony wished he had joined them, he was so sick of being treated like a civilian by the rest. He used to be a SHIELD agent, thank you very much, and while combat wasn't his primary function in the agency it was still in his job description, and he was able to hold his own just fine. So he wasn't an assassin, his body wasn't a weapon. But his mind could be a weapon, Tony smirked to himself as he put on his glove and connected it with the arc reactor in his chest. He made sure no one had seen what he had been doing and moved his fingers a little, checking if any of the joints were stiff. His arc reactor was a semi-secret for the majority of the team. Romanova and Barton knew about it of course since he had had it while he still worked for SHIELD and there's no way you can hide a power source that big from them. Romanova probably knew much more than Barton, since she was one of the agents with top security levels, but it still wasn't much. Fury had to have some theories, but the arc reactor had been Tony's most guarded secret since Obadiah Stane. He kept a lid on it on all times so it wouldn't shine through his shirt, and he avoided stripping in front of other people and metal detectors in general. 

The first time the team had seen his reactor-powered glove had been the time of Loki's attack on Otto Octavius. None of them had said anything during the mission, but when they had finally come back, Fury had been waiting for Tony, and after an hour of unpleasant questioning from Fury's side and stubborn refusal to cooperate, Tony had left the HUB after being forbidden to use his _non registered weaponry._ This ban Tony continued to ignore. If he was going against this particular slippery replicant he was bringing all he got with him. 

Tony walked to the cockpit and leaned over Romanova's shoulder just to ruffle her feathers. She glared at him and went back to piloting without a word, he must be losing his touch. That wouldn't do, Tony opened his mouth to say something that would surely piss her off, but Barton cut right in with his loud groan. "Smith, you gotta stop bringing your toy to SHIELD- sanctioned missions! You know we should arrest you for the possession of non-registered, unauthorized, illegal weaponry, man. Either you give it to SHIELD for testing or you stop using it."

"Like hell I'm giving anything to SHIELD! I already told you, you're not getting anything from me, I'm here for one job and a one job only."

"Clint, let him keep it, it might prove useful today. Save his life even."

"But Natasha, he can't just-"

"We don't have the time to deal with this now, Clint."

"That, and _Nat_ wants to get some data on it, don’t you _Nat_?" he clapped her shoulder and smiled at Barton.

"Did you expect anything else, Tony?"

Thor appeared from nowhere, making Tony flinch. "I am confused, aren't you a SHIELD agent?"

"Used to be."

"Then why are you on this case? 

Tony turned towards him and beamed. "That's because I'm the best, big guy, the very best."

"One of the best, now get your ass strapped in, we're landing," Barton scoffed.

Enclaves were the parts of the cities where the rich and powerful lived. Each was surrounded by a force field, only those who owned an id with a clearance for that particular enclave or were on a guest list could get in through the gate. The official version was: there was only a one way in and out of an Enclave, but the reality was quite different. There were some other ways to get into one if one was resourceful enough. These safe havens, with filtered water and air supply, with clean, safe streets, were not as impenetrable as the public was made to believe. Loki had known that too, as he had already managed to break in and out of a few of them unnoticed by the gate security.

With their special SHIELD pass the team got in no time and switched to an inconspicuous hovercar. The door to the enormous villa of Munin Raven was kicked in when they arrived, but there were no sounds coming from the house. They walked into the building, each with a weapon in their hands, each tense and alert. They split into two teams: Romanova and Barton headed upstairs while Tony and Thor searched the downstairs. They cautiously moved from one room to another, kept their mouths shut and eyes open.

"Guys, we found Raven, she's dead," said Barton's voice in Tony's earpiece.

The floorboards creaked under somebody's feet in the next room. Tony and Thor shared a look. Just as Thor started slowly opening the door one hand covered Tony's mouth and another grabbed the edges of his arc reactor. "One move that displeases me and I'll tear out this beautiful device of yours, Mr Smith," said a voice Tony had come to know very well, right into his earpieceless ear. A warm breath tickled his skin, heat radiated off the hand touching his mouth, there was no weird feeling to the texture of that skin. If it were not for the voice Tony would have thought there was a human standing right behind him.

A gun was pointed against Thor's temple just as he had walked into the room. He tensed and stopped dead in his tracks. A hand took Thor’s gun out of his hand and tossed it aside. 

"Loki."

"Brother."

"Why do you keep calling me that?"

"Because that's what you are."

Thor turned slowly to face them. "What is it that you want from me?"

The hand on Tony's face clenched, fingernails dug into his skin so hard they probably drew blood. Tony groaned in pain, but no one paid him even a slightest bit of attention.

"How is Odin feeling?"

"Still in the medical ward, thanks to you."

"I think you are quite mistaken, this was all his own doing." Thor kept his mouth shut and shifted a little, trying to change his position in one more to his advantage. Tony started trashing in attempt to distract Loki, he even bit him, but it seemed more of an annoyance to him than a real concern. At least he removed his hand from Tony's mouth. Yep, those fingernails definitely drew blood, it was slowly trickling down his chin. "I've been meaning to ask you, Mr Smith, why do you work for Asgard? I thought you would have been more... adverse to working with those who contributed to your downfall."

"That wasn't Asgard."

"Aren't they all of a kind? Connected. You would be surprised to know just how much."

"I don't think I would."

"Ah, yes. You know more than you let on, don't you, Mr Smith? The scorned genius of Stark Industries."

Tony huffed and smiled approvingly. "You've finally read my file."

"I couldn't go on uninformed, could I?"

"Thor? Tony? Do you copy" said Romanova in his other ear. Thor and Tony looked at each other meaningfully. They needed only a few more minutes.

"And how did you like the sad tale of Tony Smith?"

Loki straightened up, so he wasn't talking into Tony's ear anymore. "I have to say I envy you the privilege of killing Obadiah Stane."

"He's on your bucket list too?"

"In a way."

Suddenly Loki tossed an unsuspecting Tony at Romanova who had to know something was wrong after both Thor and Tony hadn’t responded to her summoning, and came to check up on them. Tony had no time to feel like an idiot, he scrambled to his feet just in time to see Loki knock out Barton on his way out. He shot a blast his way, just to feel like he had at least tried to stop Loki. He still felt wrong-footed, one moment he got Loki on some subconscious level, and the next one it was like he had never understood him at all. Tony helped Barton get back on his feet, just so he had something to do instead of standing there and feeling like a tool.

"That guy is good at making us look like a bunch of idiots. I feel like one right now."

"You're not the only one, pal, you're seriously not the only one."

* * *

After that, the brief meetings and the by the skin of the teeth captures increased. Loki attacked without a pattern or any kind of warning. The only thing that connected all of his murders was that all of his victims were employees of three biggest companies in the replicant industry - Asgard, Oscorp, and Stark Industries. Other replicant attacks slowly began to draw public attention to themselves, disappearances, robberies with eye witnesses who testified that it had been a replicant who had broken in. Journalists were going crazy - every interview with a political figure was focused on the issue, every news website published a new article on the matter every three days. Interest groups were getting rowdy - RRA and PRA leaders appeared on the news, there were protests held in front of Stark factories and SHIELD facilities, Tony had been asked to sign a petition so many times he considered yelling at every person who got too close to him on the streets. The replicant escape rate had risen to the highest in the history. Some of them were caught, most of them disappeared off the grid. None of the team had said it aloud but they all were too aware that it was Loki's doing. All of it. 

But that crafty bastard wasn't acting like he was a part of these events. His attacks were something else, he wasn't lashing out at his former owner (first attack withstanding), his attacks seemed random, except for the first one they weren't public, none of them had been covered by the media and Loki seemed fine with that. So it wasn't publicity that he was looking for. But he _was_ looking for something. Tony was sure of it, this was no revenge spree, or at least not solely a revenge spree. There was something he desperately needed, something he couldn't find. 

No matter how hard they tried, all three of them - Asgard, Oscorp, and Stark Industries - refused to give them access to their files. All they got from Thor was that Loki had been a gift from Arno Stark to Odin. Nothing more. Odin himself had become unavailable - he had been in a coma since Munin Raven's murder. All the records were sealed, only Thor could give them something, but he continued pretending to be oblivious to everything. Even though each day he looked more uneasy, he remained closed off, He even stopped taking Tony's bait. He just ignored him when he became too irritating. His interactions with Loki changed too. At first Thor had seemed confused and uneasy with Loki's behavior towards him, adamant to catch him as quickly as possible. But somewhere along their brief meetings, their team's failed traps and attempts at capturing Loki, something had changed. Thor stopped asking why Loki kept calling him 'brother', and his attempts at catching him became sloppy. Instead, he tried to engage Loki in a conversation, asked about his reasons, about his life with Odin and Frigga, but he never did it in front of the team. Except Tony; he never seemed to mind that Tony had seen this change in his behavior. Tony couldn't decide what he should think of that.

He also had no idea what to think of his own encounters with Loki. He and Thor saw him much more often than the others, one could risk saying Loki sought them out. But while Thor and Loki's _meetings_ consisted of fighting and profound emotional conversations, Tony and Loki rarely fought. They circled each other, kept each other at gun point. Sometimes Loki would disarm him, rough him up a little, but he never went for the kill. He kept asking questions, about the reasons behind Tony rejoining SHIELD, about Stane, about his gauntlet. But Tony knew how to answer without really answering, and it looked like Loki enjoyed his evasions more than he would enjoy hearing a straightforward answer. So Tony kept at it, trying to gather some intel on his own. He got nothing solid for the case. But he had learned something. 

There was nothing ordinary for a replicant about Loki. But there were a lot of things ordinary for a human about him. Sometimes he acted so human Tony forgot what he was. His mannerism, the way he spoke, the way he moved, the glint in his eye. It was all so utterly human, and unheard of in a replicant. Tony often wondered if the rest of the team noticed it too, but if they had they never mentioned it. 

Everything about Loki and this dragged out case was equally confusing and fascinating and Tony just needed to know. Know everything, what made Loki tick, how they had reached this level of development, was Loki unique or were there others, what the hell was Odin hiding, and what was Loki searching for. So maybe Tony took up separating himself from the team during their missions. Maybe he had hoped to be approached by Loki. Just a little bit.

That was how he had found the present. Loki had been filmed by a simple security camera a few blocks from a big abandoned mall building in a poorer, slum-like neighborhood, a lot like the one Tony had been living in. Since it was the neglected part of the city, no one had seen or heard anything. No one was particularly interested in the empty, ruined building. But it had looked like a good place for a hideout, so their team wasted no time, they packed their gear and flew there. After they had arrived Tony insisted on splitting, and with Thor backing up this idea he had got it his way, they had split.

He didn't have to walk far, with both of his hands outstretched, a SHIELD-issued gun in one and his blast-shooting gauntlet in the other. There was a gigantic metal box with a ribbon and a bow on top of it. It just stood there, in the middle of the room. Tony gaped at it. 

"Loki? Are you there?"

No one answered him. He circled the box slowly, but there was no card, no indication of what the whole thing was about. It was just a present. A present from Loki. A present for... Oh shit. It was so obvious.

"Thor, is today your birthday, by any chance?"

"As a matter of fact it is. But I think now is not the time for such conversations, Tony." 

"Yeah, ummm.... could you come to the third floor and give me a hand with something?"

"Of course, but you haven't seen..."

"No."

He took out a little scanner from his pocket and moved it in the front of the box.

"What are you doing?"

"Scanning, I want to know if it's safe to open this thing."

"So Loki is giving me a birthday present.”

"Looks like it. How do you feel about that?" Tony stopped scanning and looked at Thor who had been looking at the box curiously. 

"What?"

"Are you happy he remembered?" 

Thor huffed. "I can see why he likes you."

Tony decided to ignore Thor, took out his phone and called J. "Hey buddy, I sent you some data, could you tell me what's in that box, pal? I would really hate it if it were a bomb in a box."

"Certainly, sir," said J's smooth artificial voice. So unlike Loki's. Tony cursed himself for that thought and turned towards Thor again who kept staring at the box.

"Now we wait a few minutes for confirmation and open this thing, what do you think it is? A puppy?"

"Oh no. I'm terrible with taking care of things, that would be a terrible present."

"And you think Loki would know that?"

"Is there something he doesn't know?" said Thor with exasperation, but then he took a deep breath and continued in a calmer tone, "I don't know how he does it, but he knows so much... about me, my family, my life..."

"It's like he really was your brother?"

Thor turned his head towards Tony with a somber expression, but before he could open his mouth and confirm Tony's suspicions they heard footsteps behind them and Natasha appeared in the room.

"Wanted to check if you boys aren't in any trouble," she said in a way of explanation and approached the box. "Present from Loki? Do you know how to open it?" 

"We're waiting for a confirmation it's safe to open it in the first place."

"Any sign of Loki?"

"None, I think that security camera was just a way to get us here, that guy doesn't make mistakes like that."

"He hasn’t made a mistake like that, yet."

"You think he will?"

"They always do."

"But he's-" 

Tony closed his mouth before he blabbered something stupid, but Romanova raised her eyebrow at him. "Different?"

"Kinda, yeah," he shrugged and tried to look unconcerned.

"Tony is there something you're not sharing with us?"

"With SHIELD?” he snorted. "There's a lot of things I'm not sharing with SHIELD."

"You know what I mean."

"Yes, I know why I was brought back."

"Fury asked you to join our team because it's a delicate matter and we could use your help."

"Exactly, you could use my help. In a delicate case. My help. In an Asgard case. Romanova, we both know what Fury wants me to do. What he expects me to do, and guess what? I'm not- Hey Thor, buddy, don't touch that yet, we don't know what's in there." While Tony and Romanova had been arguing Thor had moved towards the box and put his hand on it.

"It's a present, Tony. I don't think it's going to injure me, at least fatally."

"Well, I still vote Deadly Gift."

"Good thing it's not for you then," said Thor and pulled the ribbon with his other hand. 

The side of the gift box opened with a hiss and from the opening fell out a mutilated dead body. Tony turned his head back before he could get a good look at the bloody remains. 

"Do you recognize him Thor?" asked Romanova, and oh my god, Tony heard a thump, somebody must have turned the body around. Tony gagged at the thought of Natasha touching that bloody lump with her hand. 

"Yes. Yes I do. That's Malekith. He- I- He's the criminal I have been trying to catch for a very long time, the only one who got away."

Tony couldn't help but cackle. "So do you like your present?"

"You could say it was thoughtful of him, I suppose."

Tony cackled again and glanced back at them. "Oh my god, I have to go get some air. Yup, that's- that's not what I'm aaaa.... used to. Fuck, he smells." Tony staggered out of the room, to the escalators and sat down on the ground. He covered his eyes with his hands in hopes to erase that image from his mind. "Fuuuuuuck."

"Which one is it? A dead body or blood?" asked a smooth voice that started to haunt the inside of Tony's mind. 

"Combined effort I guess. Both on their own are fine, together usually too, if sometimes hard to take. But that right there, that's sick."

"It's a form of poetic justice, I'm sure Thor appreciates it."

"I guess you'd know that better than me."

There was no answer but Tony heard silent steps somewhere to his left. He raised his head and looked around but didn't see Loki.

"Should I expect a present for my birthday? Cause if the answer's yes then I have a request: no dead bodies please. A puppy, you could give me a puppy, that would be nice."

"I have a feeling it wouldn't survive, you fail at taking care of yourself, who's to say you would do a better job at taking care of another living thing?"

"Yeah, can you step out of the shadows? I feel stupid talking to somebody I can't see."

"This is not my problem." 

"You're an asshole."

Loki laughed. "Is that what you think of me?" 

"Oh I think about you a lot," said Tony, and facepalmed as soon as the words left his mouth. 

"Oh really?"

"I think you're looking for something, something you hope some high ranking employees would have. I think you're desperate. There's some kind of deadline, a clock's ticking and you still don't have whatever it is that you want. I think there's something different about you. I think you're too human. You- you have all this- you act like a normal human being, not only in the grand scale of things but in the small too. It's not that you make your own decisions, have some kind of agenda, but-" Tony took a deep breath trying to rearrange the thoughts inside his head. "You have a personality." He felt a phantom touch across his mouth, a breath tickling his ear. "And a warm skin, you breathe."

Suddenly Loki was there, leaning against one of the support beams across from Tony. "That's quite an observation."

"Well, I'm very observant." He could shoot him right now. At least try to. But he just... didn't feel like it. He knew it would be pointless, he probably wouldn't hit him, and they would stop talking. He looked so tired, or maybe it was Tony's own exhaustion reflecting on the way he perceived everything else?

"Should I be honored to be the object of such scrupulous observation?" 

"I don't have time for boring things."

A shadow fell on Loki's face. "Things," he spat.

Tony groaned "You know what I mean, I just said you have a personality. You can't say that I-"

"Like a thing. A TV can have a personality too," Loki took a few steps forward. There was a snarl on his face, and Tony suddenly stopped feeling remotely safe. He had no idea when he had first stopped feeling too threatened in Loki's company, but he had, and now it was like he had remembered who had left a dead body in a box for them to find. He activated the beam in the middle of his gauntlet and stood up.

"That's not what I said and you know it."

"Do I?" he stalked closer. Tony took a few slow steps back and hit the railing. Fantastic, now what? 

"Yes you do. You are too smart to not be aware of that."

Loki had finally reached him and stepped uncomfortably close, looming above him. His whole face cleared, with exception of his eyes which still glared daggers at Tony. "Flattery? Is that what's going to save you?"

Tony's heart started beating so hard against his ribcage it hurt. His insides clenched, his throat was so dry it was painful to swallow. "Thor says you like me."

"Is that a very human thing to do?"

"Are we really going to play this game?"

"I don't think you're in any place to complain, Mr Smith. You're in my power, now."

Tony smirked at him and touched his chest with his gauntleted hand. "Am I really?"

A smile appeared on Loki's face. "So observant, yet you forget about one small detail."

"Yeah? And what is it?"

"Odin's in a coma. While Thor works all day long, his poor, poor mother stays at home all by herself. She must be lonely, so lonely she would probably answer some difficult questions if the one asking was charming enough."

Tony frowned at him in confusion. 

"Hey Tony! You there?" yelled Romanova from the other room.

Before Tony could even think about responding Loki grabbed his hand, aimed it upward,,knocked the gun out of his other hand and then pushed him back, causing Tony to fall over the railing. There was a brief moment where he thought he was going to die. That motherfucker was going to kill him. But then at the last moment he caught one of the cables hanging from the ceiling. 

"You fucking asshole!" he yelled after Loki. 

Loki laughed and yelled back, "Send Thor my regards." Then there were a lot of echoing footsteps and nothing else.

Tony clicked his earpiece, "Guys, I may need a little help here."

* * *

He had been staring at the screen full of Gungnir family pictures for hours. Loki had suggested he go talk to her, she certainly was in a position to give them some answers. She hadn't been interrogated at the beginning, claiming she was too upset by the attack to talk to them, and Odin had stated in no negotiable terms it was not their place to push his wife in any way. But then his condition had worsened and he fell into a coma. But even without Odin in the picture none of them tried to talk to her. 

It had seemed very important to Loki that he talk to her. Not so he would know why Odin had owned him despite his public anti-replicant speeches. That Loki would have told him himself. No, Tony had to see something for himself. Otherwise he wouldn't believe it. Something shocking and.... they were talking about Loki, about his otherness, lack of replicant like characteristics. _So observant, yet you forget about one small detail._

"J, what do we know about Frigga Gungnir?"

"Born as Frigga Vanir, daughter of Freyr and Gerd Vanir. She studied in Alfheim University where she met her current husband Odin Gungnir. She holds a bachelor and a master’s degree in political science, and up to the day of the assassination attempt in 2204 she had been the head of Asgardia foundation which she had founded eighteen years earlier. After the assassination attempt she withdrew from the public scene and focused on rehabilitation. Since then she has been avoiding big events and has been rarely seen in public." 

"Where was Thor then?"

"Thor Gungnir had been deployed on Asteroid 45632, fighting the rebellion. He came back for two weeks after the assassination attempt, while Frigga was in a hospital. After the doctors had confirmed she would recover fully he left." 

"Show me the first picture of her taken after the assassination attempt."

It had taken J a few seconds to select a picture but soon enough there she was, standing next to Odin, in her trademark golden dress, smiling politely at some businessman. J zoomed in on her face, Tony looked at her and pondered. One could say nearly dying changes you, and Tony could agree with that statement in one hundred percent. One could say being a victim of an assassination attempt against your husband takes away your sense of security, and Tony could guess that would be the truth also. But what if there was another reason for Frigga's withdrawal from the public sphere, for her thousand yard stare? 

Thor was always somewhere else these days, and it's not like he still lived with his parents. He knew her as his mother, some things he associated with her possibly hadn't changed. She still listened to him, coddled him, remembered about his birthday. 

"J, when they first introduced replicants there was a lot of uproar about distinguishing them from humans, and there was this guy who invented that machine that could distinguish humans from replicants if there ever was a need for that. The machine has proven to be unnecessary pretty quickly, but is there any chance we could get our hands on it?"

"You're talking about Voight-Kampff machine, sir, and I will see what I can do."

"Thanks J."

It had taken a few days but eventually Tony was able to pick up a package with the Voight-Kampff machine from a depot downtown. In the meantime Tony made sure to hang around Thor more often, using that tentative bond being Loki's two favorite team members had created. Romanova and Barton picked up on Tony's attempt to make friends, but didn't comment. Not yet, at least. They probably thought Tony was working some kind of angle, and while they weren't wrong there was no way Tony was sharing everything he had found out with them. He had given them something to chew on, just so they would think he was cooperating. But some things, like that Mrs Gungnir was living alone in this big mansion, with only a few of the staff still employed since they had stopped having so many guests and no balls whatsoever, or that Thor was currently staying at his childhood home, but was to be gone for a whole weekend because his girlfriend was having some big birthday party away on E-459, Tony kept to himself. Instead, he packed the Voight-Kampff machine, took a shower and trimmed his beard, put on a clean, ironed button-up shirt and slacks. It was time he met Frigga Gungnir. 

He pushed the intercom button and prayed Thor really wasn't home that night. 

"How may I help you, sir?" said a deep voice and part of Tony was kind of disappointed the Gungnirs had no elderly butler to go with their forgotten-era styled mansion. 

"Hello, I am here to see Thor."

"I'm afraid he is not here, he is away for the weekend."

"What? Really? Oh darn, he told me to come over today. Oh well, could I speak with Mrs Gungnir then? It's really important and I would be most thankful if she agreed to speak with me."

"And who would like to see her?"

"Ummm.... Barton. Clint Barton. Thor and I are working together."

"Very well, I'll ask."

Tony smiled gratefully at the camera and took out his phone and started playing with it.

After a moment the gate opened before him. "You may enter, Mr Barton, Mrs Gungnir will be waiting for you in the hall." Tony beamed. The easy part was over.

He walked to the front door quickly, not looking around, too focused on selling his story to check out the splendor Thor grew up with. 

Thor's mother was truly a beautiful woman. Tony could see that on all of the pictures he had seen a few days earlier, but he had always thought they were photoshopped to make her look better. But this was not the case, not at all. Sure, she was missing that... vitality that always accompanied her in the pictures from before the assassination attempt, but she remained breathtakingly beautiful. Tony didn't even have to pretend to be in awe of her. She smiled at his rambling introduction, but it was a faint smile and it was gone as quick as it appeared. 

"Welcome Mr Barton, Heimdall said you wanted to see me because of something important."

Heimdall huh? Thor really hadn’t thought his lies through. Maybe it was a family trait, Gungnirs just didn’t give a shit if you knew they were lying to you or not.

"Oh yes. Thor was supposed to give me his C42 rifle so I could run some tests on it during the weekend. Ummm.... I texted him few minutes ago and he told me that if it's not somewhere on his desk then he has it back at his apartment on E-459."

"And you would like us to give to you?"

"If it's there, I hope it's not too much of a problem."

"No problem at all, Mr Barton," she took out a Stark K-pad and started writing a command on it. "Rifle C42?"

"Yes, thank you very much ma'am."

She smiled at him. "No problem at all, Mr Barton. Heimdall will bring it if it's there. Would you like something to drink in the meantime? Tea? Coffee?"

"Some coffee would be nice."

"Of course," she started typing on the K-pad again. "If you would follow me to the living room, please." 

Tony walked behind her to the adjoining room. It was full of plants Tony had only seen on pages of a textbook, there was also a couch and a set of armchairs standing around an antique coffee table. 

They made small talk, Tony brought out all the charm he had, telling her about his 'scientific work' and 'stories from his childhood' (all of them made up), until Frigga's K-pad blipped. 

"If you'll excuse me, it's probably Heimdall."

"Of course."

Tony busied himself with adding cream to the coffee he had barely touched. Frigga's brow furrowed while she read the message, Tony feigned obliviousness. "I'm afraid Heimdall was unable to find that rifle, Mr Barton. But I could phone Thor if you would like. And we could wait, you could finish your coffee in peace."

"There's no need to bother him on his weekend away with Jane, Mrs Gungnir. I'll just focus on my other project." 

She nodded politely and looked down on her hands clasped together on her lap. Tony took another sip of coffee trying to plan his next move. He was about to ask her if there was something wrong when her head snapped up and she looked him straight in the eyes. "How is your search for m-" her lips twitched uncomfortably before continuing, "for Loki going?"

"We're doing our best, but he's not easy to catch. Actually, I would like to test my new project on him when we catch him."

Frigga's brow furrowed. "Your new project?"

"Yes, you see, I'm trying to develop a machine that would be helpful in differentiating between humans and high-developed androids. It works sort of like a polygraph, I ask a variety of questions and measure the emotional response. Would you like to see how it works?"

When Frigga smirked Tony felt his insides turn into ice. "That sounds like something that should have been developed years ago." Shit. Tony's brain scrambled for a good excuse, he should have thought about this possibility. After all Frigga wasn't living in a cave when the whole ‘replicants will replace the humankind’ scare happened, her very own husband was the face leading it. Tony was just about to stand up with an excuse ready when Frigga spoke again. "I would love to see how it works."

Oh. That he hadn't anticipated. "Of course, it so happens I have it with me now."

"How fortunate. Would you like something to eat? It looks like we're going to sit here for quite some time."

Tony smiled and shook his head. "I hope not."

But she had been right. Agreeing to take the test despite the fact that she knew Tony was lying was an admission by itself. But still, it was quite fascinating to see how complex and advanced her programming was. You would never guess, never see the details that betrayed her non-humanity if you weren't looking for them in the first place. When Tony declared the end of the test it was getting bright outside and Tony could feel his eyes twitch from lack of sleep and excess of coffee ingestion.

They stood up and looked at each other. There was no trace of wariness on her face, she looked exactly the way she had looked when Tony came in. He stored this information in the back of his mind as a flaw in the design.

"So what is your verdict, Mr Smith?"

Busted. He was so completely busted, on all possible fronts. Oh well, might as well drop the act.

"Do you really want to know?"

"Is there a reason I shouldn't?" asked Frigga with her face carefully blank.

"I don't know. You tell me."

"I think it's time you left."

"I think so too."

He packed his things and walked towards the door but before he could walk through them Frigga spoke again. "Please send my regards to my son next time you see him." 

"Which one?" Tony asked without turning to face her.

"I think you know." 

Tony nodded and walked out. 

* * *

Loki was sitting cross-legged on one of the workbenches and fiddling with some unfinished project when he finally heard the hum of the moving elevator. He put the thing on the table next to him and straightened his back. The anticipation made him uneasy, but it was nothing compared to the way he felt every time Asgard's scientists declared it was time to run some tests. The very thought of their big smiles and cheerful voices made his insides churn. They had been so... giddy and nothing made him more disgusted than the sight of them, the sound of their voices mixed with the hum of their computers. The cold and bright electric light - Loki shook his head to clear it. Somewhere to his left the elevator came to a stop. Surprisingly, Tony didn't even blink when he came in and saw the replicant he had been chasing for weeks sitting on a workbench in the center of a room that seemed to be a workshop of some kind. Instead he put his bag on the ground and brushed past Loki, towards the giant screen at the opposite wall of the room. 

"You took your time," Loki teased without looking back at Tony. He was not going to show the man that he considered him to be a threat. That would make him more cocky, if such a thing was even possible.

"I like to be thorough." Loki's lips twitched but he didn't turn, even though he felt exposed and defenseless. But he had a lot of experience dealing with being exposed and defenseless, and the room was dark, the mad scientist in it was too shabby-looking, and there was nothing... giddy about him. So he remained put. "You didn't make an appointment. Didn't your mother teach you it's rude to make unexpected visits?"

Loki gritted his teeth. "And how did she like your unexpected visit?"

"We had an interesting chat."

The screen behind him lightened up, he fought the urge to look back and see what Tony was doing. "Did she pass the test?"

He huffed and started walking towards Loki, "Here's what I don't understand," Tony's steps came to a stop just behind him. "How come she knows everything Frigga, the woman who gave birth to Thor, knew. How come Thor didn't notice any difference between his mother now and two years ago?"

"Maybe she practiced a lot."

"That's not it, and we both know it."

"Then what is it?" 

"You tell me." 

Loki looked down at his hands and noticed he was twiddling with a screwdriver, he hadn't even noticed when he had started doing it. He put it on the table and turned around. Tony was leaning back on another workbench, undoubtedly he was trying to look nonchalant, but instead he just looked tired. Loki took in his appearance, nice slacks, rumpled shirt, messy hair, and something peculiar he had noticed a few times already. Strange markings on his neck. 

"That's a rather personal question, don't you think?" Tony shrugged and it made Loki smile, all that posturing to hide something Loki knew very well: he was dying to know. "How about a trade?"

"Personal question for personal question?" Tony looked quite surprised, as if he wasn't aware of Loki's curiosity at all. But he must have been. Thor had pointed out to Loki on numerous occasions his fascination with the man was quite obvious. But that was Thor, maybe he was just teasing him the way he- the way he never had. Because they weren’t brothers. Loki closed his eyes for a moment to chase the confusing thought away.."Exactly."

"Deal." 

He pondered for a moment about how he should approach the subject. Meanwhile Smith started squirming impatiently, so Loki slid of the table, leaned in and tugged the collar of Tony's shirt down, exposing skin marked with strange blue markings. "What is this?"

The man gripped his wrist tightly and tried to pry his hand off. When this didn't work he settled on glaring at him and leaning as far away from Loki as it was possible. "At least you don't fuck around," he murmured. "Ask another question."

"You are asking about the insides of my mind, about what makes me..." Loki searched in his mind for the expression he had heard the man use before. "Tick. There's nothing more private than that. You will tell me _everything_ there's to know about these markings, and if you lie," he shifted his hand so the tips of his fingers were pressing at Tony's pulse point, "I'll know."

Smith licked his lips and looked Loki straight in the eyes. There was something firm and daring in them, something that made Loki want to terrify him, lash out, leave, do something that would make him stop. But he did nothing, he stared right back and waited.

"I'm dying." Oh. That actually explained a lot. It was an observation Loki had made some days ago, Tony was looking worse with their every meeting, there were days when he just looked pale, sickly. "It's... the thing that keeps me alive is killing me," he chuckled. "Let me tell you: the irony burns. Even literally sometimes."

He looked down, breaking their eye-contact. "Go on," Loki whispered.

"I grew up in an orphanage, you know? You probably do, you've read all the files. But what you don't know is that there was a family interested in adopting me, and I was so happy, they only wanted me because I made for a good playmate for their kid, but still, someone wanted to take me away from that hellhole," he stopped to take a deep breath, his pulse sped up under Loki's fingers. "I had a friend, a best friend. Rhodey. We knew there was a possibility we wouldn't see each other after I was adopted so we figured we had to have one last adventure, one last stupid decision before I go live in this enormous mansion in one of the enclaves. So we sneaked out of our room after Ms and Mr Jarvis went to sleep. There was a Stark Facility nearby, they built it recently, no one had any idea what was inside. We were stupid kids, we needed to know what was inside. I- eh- long story short, the security system was top-notch. I was lucky to be alive," he smiled mirthlessly. "They had to cut out parts of my ribs to make place for a magnet that would keep shrapnel in place." He released his grip on Loki's wrist and started unbuttoning his shirts, exposing more and more marked skin. And there, in the center of his chest was a black circle, Tony took a hold of it and twisted. A blue light started shining from what appeared to be a miniaturized arc reactor, something that had been Stark Industries most precious invention. "It's powered by palladium, the only thing that really makes it work. For most of the years the magnet was powered differently, but there were- failures and... stuff I don't want to talk about. So yeah, the only thing that really works is the arc reactor with a palladium core. And that's what's- that is killing me," Tony looked back at him, his expression carefully empty. "Palladium poisoning." 

"And there's nothing-"

"No," he snapped and started buttoning up his shirt. "Your turn now."

Oh. Loki's insides clenched. He forgot about that. He took a step back and looked to the side, at a wall with peeling flowery wallpaper. He traced the pattern with his eyes as he spoke. "I know how it feels to walk barefoot on a beach. I have memories of... traveling through space with a crew I know well, they're like family-" he let out a brittle laugh. "I know how to knit, and cook, drive a hover car, pilot a jet." He glanced at Tony, who was staring at him with fascination clear on his face. "I remember giving birth to a child. I- I've seen so many things, you wouldn't believe. I've lived a thousand lives. And yet... I've never lived any of them at all. But it feels so real- I- I remember so many things, and feelings... I feel them all." he looked at Tony again, this time he didn’t look away. "Sometimes I don't know which memories are mine, are all of them? None? What is my name?" his voice wavered, but he continued, he could not stop, would not stop before he said it all. "Am I a person? I don't know. I don't-" he took a deep shaky breath. "Do you think I can feel? Do you think I am alive?"

"I- I don't know," Loki was unprepared for how much it would sting to hear these words. He knew he should be prepared to hear them, he heard them all the time, he’d _seen_ them on many faces. And yet... he was fool enough to hope for some understanding. A naive part of him believed there was something different- something connecting both of them. He was wrong. He felt his face twist in a sneer on its own accord, he stepped back, fully intending to leave when Tony caught him by the elbow. "And I don't really care. I don't need to know," he groaned in irritation as Loki watched him warily. "You're not _a thing_ okay? It's just not that easy to say what you are."

And here it was, that feeling back again, this need to break something, or flee, or just... stop. And yet again he did none of those things, he smirked instead. "Isn't that sweet of you," he teased. 

There was a moment when Tony seemed surprised, but he composed himself quickly and grinned. "I am nice like that. So is there any chance you'll knit me a sweater? A scarf maybe? As a birthday gift, Thor got one, it's only fair I get one too."

"Is that so?"

"We're your favorites."

"Whatever gave you that idea?" 

Tony raised his eyebrows and said nothing. Loki smiled and shook his head slightly. 

"No scarf for Tony? I guess I can live with that. Anyway, I have a better idea for a present."

"And what would that be?"

He hesitated before answering. He was standing close now, Loki hadn't noticed when he moved during their conversation. 

"Why are you doing this?" asked Tony softly.

He was disappointed even though he wasn't sure why. "Because they deserve it."

"They deserve to die."

"Do you know what they did?"

"I think I do now. But it doesn't give you the right to kill people."

"It gives me a reason to. I think you understand that."

Smith frowned but didn't deny. "You could have just left."

"What about revenge? You understand that too, don't you?" Tony smiled bitterly. "That's what I thought, you may work for SHIELD but you are not like them."

"I'm like you then?"

"Not exactly. But you can't say there are no similarities."

He searched Loki's face for a moment for something and said, "I guess there are. So this whole thing is for revenge?"

"Come now, you don't expect me to tell you everything, do you? We're not on the same side." Yet. But they will be. Loki will make it happen, one way or the other.

"Well I've been courteous, haven't tried to arrest you even once since you came in. I deserve to be rewarded."

"And how exactly would you contain me?" Loki straightened out and looked around the room. "I shall take my leave now. Before you decide to capture me after all."

Tony snickered and took a step back, so Loki could move. He snatched the project he had been fiddling with earlier while the owner wasn't looking and made his way towards the exit.

"And hey! Loki!" He turned around to look at Tony. "Your mother says hi."

His insides turned into ice. She- Oh. He opened his mouth to respond but nothing came out. His thoughts were jumbled and incomprehensive. In the end he left without saying a word.

* * *

* * *

He would never get used to the off putting feeling of having a data probe inserted in his headjack. But it was necessary evil and he had to do it, even if nothing else made him feel so much like a machine than this. He disconnected with a hiss and beckoned Niobe to come closer. 

"I need you to connect with this system, the file I've opened for you, we need this one. I want you to rescue him for me and bring him here."

She nodded and replaced him on the chair. "And who is he?"

"Someone who will help us win over an agent." 

He left her there and moved down the corridor. He was surrounded by the sounds of clinking metal, sounds of footsteps, and so many voices. He let the noise wash out all thoughts from his head, and for a minute he was relaxed and content. But then suddenly he was no longer in the NYC underground, he was on a spaceship heading for F453, getting ready for a Chitauri base take over. His- her name was Kaiya and she was feeling restless, the command was supposed to send them additional data about the mission hours ago, and they had no more time to stall. She had to make a decision, should they wait or attack? If they lose this chance there was little possibility for another. She stopped and turned towards a touch panel in the wall, she swiped her hand across it but there still was no message waiting for her- him? her. So they would have to attack alone and hope nothing went wrong. She was a good commander and hers were good people. They will make it.

"Loki?"

He felt as if someone had squeezed his brain and then abruptly let go. The image in front of his eyes disappeared and he was where he was supposed to be. He was Loki and he was not a human. He was a replicant, an android, Nexus 6. 

Niobe shook his arm again, "Loki? Are you all right?"

"Yes, of course. What is it?"

"I'm heading out. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Good, as soon as you get back and I have our new friend on board with the plan we set off."

She left and Loki sat down on the ground, closed his eyes and tried to chase away the memory. It was not his, he was Loki, he was a replicant, he'd never been a commander, he had never fought with the Chitauri, he was made 2203, so he couldn't possibly exist in 2199. He was on Earth, the Mother Planet, he had solid ground under his feet, he was not in space. He was Loki. No one else. 

* * *

He and Thor were sitting together in the workshop/headquarters doing nothing while the rest of the team attended to their other duties, when Tony finally decided he couldn't take it anymore. He had to know. He just had to. Nothing new about that feeling, he felt that way most of his life, but generally he didn't last that long without finding out. He was kind of proud of himself. But keeping his mouth shut any longer was impossible, unhealthy even. He just had to know. So he rolled his chair in Thor's direction and waited for the moment where Thor was about to complete the mission in Mass Effect MACS0647-JD he had been trying to complete the whole morning before speaking and breaking his concentration. Just for shits and giggles. 

"Why you don't hate him?"

"What?" a confused Thor asked, and glanced at Tony. When he looked back there was no way he would complete the mission. "I was so close," he said mournfully.

"Thor, why do you not hate him? He tried to kill your father."

"I don't know what you are talking about," he restarted the mission with his eyes plastered to the screen.

Tony took a deep breath. He had been wondering about this for days, because while Thor was doing his job trying to catch Loki and helping in taking down some of the rogue replicants, he never seemed to.... well, hate Loki for creating all this mess. Guy tried to kill his father, put him in a coma, and Thor never seemed to be more than a little bit angry with him. There was a connection between them, something unspoken, and the rest of the team had picked up on it. But no one had said a word. Until now at least. But it was Tony, it was different, he had his very own connection with their target. 

"Yes you do. Why don't you hate him, Thor?"

Thor sighed and put the controller down. "I'm just being professional Tony, nothing unusual about it."

"Yeah, we're both being so professional here, buddy, best agents Fury could hope for." Thor smiled at him fondly, Tony didn't even try to suppress his eye roll. "You say you've never met him."

"Because I haven't."

"C'mon Thor, you can speak freely, I disabled all recording devices in this room an hour ago."

"I have never met Loki. I knew nothing of his existence before the attack."

"So why don't you hate him?"

Thor looked down at his lap and smiled gently. "My mother speaks highly of him."

"Your- oh. Even though..." Tony had to bite his lip to stop himself from asking another question. Do you know, Thor? Do you know the woman who raised you is dead? Do you know the person you call your mother is not the same person that gave birth to you? 

"Yes," said Thor plainly, completely unaware of Tony's internal struggle.

"You're not going to tell me more, are you?"

"I won't confide my family matters to you. No."

"But your family problems are part of our case!" He almost punched Thor in the face to relieve his frustration, but his survival instincts yelled at him not to do that. They had a point. That would be something he would probably regret. Very painfully. 

"No. Your job is to catch Loki, not pry into my personal matters. And certainly not to ask too many questions. And you are bent on doing exactly the opposite."

"You're not exactly rushing to catch him either."

Thor stared at him for a moment and then picked up his controller and started playing as if nothing had happened. 

"Are you seriously just going to ignore me?" 

He remained silent and glued to the screen.

"Thor."

Nothing.

"Thor, this is childish."

Not even a twitch.

"Oh fuck you too."

* * *

It was not a good day. Tony had stayed up all night thinking about Thor, and Loki, about Loki and Thor. And Frigga, the human one and the android one. He was slowly unwrapping the whole thing and he had to be careful about it. Thor might have been friendly about this whole thing but he was loyal to his father, and if Tony became a threat Thor would squish him like a bug. Probably. 

Tony didn't know Thor very well, at first he thought he had a good hang on the guy but then he started acting weird about this whole situation with Loki, and Tony honestly had no idea what to think anymore. What exactly did he know? What was Thor pretending to know, because he was aware there was something to know? What was he oblivious about? 

And there was of course SHIELD he had to worry about. He wasn't exactly their most trusted employee. The only reason Fury had reached out to him was because Tony wouldn’t be able to stop himself from getting to the bottom of this. Then after Tony revealed everything to him, gave Fury enough blackmail material, or caused a scandal for which he would take the blame since he really had nothing to lose anymore, get sacked once again and receive an extra payment on the side. But well... Tony wasn't feeling particularly cooperative. And sure, Romanova was here to spy on him, but Tony was very careful about everything he had found out, kept everything on external drives, never brought them with him. When she was following him home he spent a few nights at a bar drinking himself to sleep just to throw her off. 

There was of course Barton who was supposed to rekindle their.... companionship, but this time Tony was ready, he would not let anyone else get under his skin. 

Except Loki. It looked like he had no say in that anymore. No matter what he was doing, at the back of his head there was an unending string of Loki, Loki, Loki. He just - set his claws in Tony's mind and held on tight. Or maybe a better metaphor would be that he was running through Tony’s thoughts, cackling every minute of the day. 

So when Tony woke up that day with a crick in the neck and a wicked hangover, it was no wonder his first words were, "J, is there something new on the news about Loki?"

"No sir, he has been surprisingly quiet these past few days."

"No mysterious deaths? Huge android break outs?"

"The only thing that might have been his doing is a kidnapping of a replicant from St. Augustus Hospital in District 34."

"Wasn't that a Stark-owned hospital?"

"I believe you're correct, sir."

"Huh. Nothing else besides that?"

"Nothing, sir."

Tony barely managed to put himself together when Natasha called. He groaned and seriously considered just ignoring the whole thing. But then there was a thing he had been hoping to do. For days now he had been developing a light body armor that wouldn't be too heavy, and boots with thrusters built-in to go with his gauntlet, both powered by the arc reactor in his chest. He had been thinking about making a helmet too, with a HUD screen inside, so he could see all the data and fight/move at the same time, plus some additional protection wouldn't go amiss. But he had had no time for that just yet. So he figured: why not. This time was as good as any to test his new toy. 

So he flew to the place of the attack on his own. He even managed to catch the rest of the team en route. They were not amused.

"Fury's not going to like this," Natasha said from behind the control wheel.

"You really shouldn't do that, Tony," Barton added.

"Well, Fury can kiss my ass."

"You can't use unauthorized weapons Tony. We've talked about this."

"Believe me, I remember, _Nat_ , but I'm not giving it to anybody. End of story. I made it and it's mine."

"Steve?" Romanova turned towards Rogers who had rejoined their team just a few days earlier. He hadn't said a word to Tony since he got back, and it was a surprisingly good arrangement. He clearly resented Tony and Tony didn't mind being resented by him. It wasn't like he was sorry for killing Stane. He was just sorry he almost got sent to prison for doing it. Besides, if somebody had killed Rhodey, no matter why, Tony would probably end them. So, just saying, he could relate with the guy on some level. 

"Nothing to say, Captain?" Tony baited, just because he could.

Rogers looked at him icily. "What I care about now is getting the job done. This discussion is the exact opposite of that. Let him keep his toys for now. Focus on what's going on."

"So generous of you."

"Let's just get the job done." 

They arrived without another word spoken between them. 

There was a serious fight waiting for them. Apparently soldier-model androids had been disappearing for some time now, but no one thought it would be a good idea to inform SHIELD about this. So now SHIELD was left to deal with a replicant platoon lead by Loki; a platoon which was doing a pretty good job at taking over one of the Stark facilities if Tony could add.

The place was in chaos. Stark's security team were good, but not good enough to fight off over a dozen of soldier-replicants. Everywhere Tony turned there was some fight going on. He had never been in the middle of a..., well in the middle of a battle. It was confusing and scary as hell. He barely managed to stay alive, what with losing sight of all of his teammates barely twenty minutes after their arrival. He and Romanova were supposed to get in to the lower levels, try to get out the scientists trapped there, but they got separated when a group of androids swarmed in and managed to drive Tony away, breaking his earpiece in the meantime. So he wandered the corridors in search of some kind of staircase, or an elevator maybe, and cursed himself for not making that helmet after all. Everything would be so much easier if he had a HUD. 

And then he saw him. Loki. Running down the hallway on his right. He stopped at the intersection, looked at Tony and smirked. Then he started running again. 

So Tony did the only thing that made sense to him, he followed. Loki navigated the corridors with confidence and dodged every blast coming his way with grace. It looked like the scenery that made Tony feel pumped with adrenaline and fear fueled confusion was a walk in the park for Loki. Tony wished the bastard would trip and break something, the smug little shit. 

When they finally ran outside there was a hover bike ready for Loki. But Tony had a surprise of his own, he activated the boosters and flew right after him without stopping. He could swear the asshole smiled wider when he saw that. Flying without a helmet was a nightmare though. He was barely able to keep his eyes open to see where he was flying, it hurt like a son of a bitch, made it almost impossible to breathe, and forced him to go slower than he would have wished. And he swallowed so many bugs. Bugs were seriously the worst. 

They moved away from the battle, waved between the streets which were getting more deserted. And just as the windburn was starting to get unbearable they arrived at a giant metal mountain he knew pretty well from his parts-supply runs. The Junkyard. The biggest dumping ground within a thousand miles. And Loki promptly disappeared. Tony stopped and looked around but it was like the guy got swallowed by the depths of hell. 

"Oh come on! That's rather rude of you to disappear like that!" He landed and walked among piles of junk. "Is this a joke?" A cold shiver ran down his spine as another thought popped into his mind. "Is this a trap?"

"It is more of an arranged meeting," said a voice to his left. Tony abruptly turned and stared at the man standing then. No, not a man. A replicant, he had no irises and his hands were not covered by synthetic skin, leaving his metal skeleton bare for everyone to see. He looked like a failed crossover between Nexus 5 and Garrot 34. 

"And why should we meet?"

"We have something in common. St Augustus hospital."

"What?" 

"Throughout my whole existence I was working there, operating when the doctors were too scared to risk their hands shaking."

Something in Tony's brain clicked. The story about his accident, the story he had told Loki. The report about a missing android from St Augustus staff. "You're the one-"

"I performed an operation on you, Anthony Smith. 5th of April 2183. Shrapnel in the chest. I am the one who saved your life."

"And what do you want for that?" What was Loki trying to achieve with this? 

"I want nothing. Wanting things is not in my programming. Intelligence is, ability to make a decision, but I do not want."

"Then why are you here?"

The android remained silent, unmoving. It was bizarre, a face that didn't even twitch, eyes that didn't blink, breast that didn't move up and down with each breath. 

"What's your name?"

"My name is Yinsen."

"Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too."

His voice didn't inflect as he uttered these well-versed responses. 

"And why are we here?"

"I like it here." 

".... okay."

"It's a cemetery."

That Tony did not expect. He looked around. Well, it was a fitting description.

"That pile over there," Yinsen raised his hand and pointed with his titanium alloy finger at a heap next to Tony, "is where broken down machines from St Augustus are."

Tony took a good look at it. There were in fact pieces of what looked like medical equipment, some parts of what used to be a replicant even. An arm here, part of a core there. He was man enough to admit it creeped him out. Then he remembered why he was there and got pissed. That bastard, working the sympathy angle. The worst part was that it was working. Tony was mad at Odin for his anti-replicant campaign, at SHIELD for making a lot of profit on pursuing replicants who broke free, at himself for being so easily manipulated, and at Loki for being a manipulative bastard. 

"So what am I supposed to do here?"

"He wants you to thank me."

It shouldn't make him feel so guilty, hearing Yinsen say that in his monotonous voice. But it did, so he took a step towards the android and gripped his hand. He looked him straight into his irisless eyes and took a deep breath.

"Yinsen, thank you for saving my life. It's been a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, Mr Smith."

"You can call me Tony."

* * *

Tony mulled over his meeting with Yinsen as he was sitting on a bed in the medical ward, waiting for the nurse to finish patching up all of his minor cuts and bruises. He managed to get back and slip into the building without anyone noticing he had been gone. He answered all of the questions with a story about how his earpiece got smashed and how he tried to get to the lower levels but was too engrossed in the fight to find a way to go down. They all believed him without a problem. They suspected a mere field agent would be overwhelmed by an attack such as this. Tony let them believe that was what happened. 

In the end the team had failed. The facility was ruined, all of the data was stolen, they hadn’t managed to catch any working androids, and those who were destroyed in the fight had been wiped blank. The atmosphere on the way back was tense, none of them spoke much, Tony pretended to feel as weary and glum as the rest. 

But honestly? He didn't care one bit about the wreckage nor about the top secret data stolen. He had met the man who saved his life. Listened to the story about how the doctors thought him beyond saving, but then an android spoke up without anyone addressing him. He said he could remove as much of the shrapnel as possible without killing him, he said a magnet placed in the middle of his chest could keep the remaining pieces in place. It was not an ideal plan (and Tony knew just how much) but it was the best they could do for him with a limited budget and still on Earth. Ironic, how he would have to travel beyond Earth to highly-advanced medical facilities in Andromeda Galaxy to get rid of the thing that made it impossible to him to travel through space. Only people of perfect health got go leave the Earth. The rest had to stay there, live outside the enclaves where the rich had a non-ending supply of clean water and fresh air. 

"Tony?"

Barton's voice shook him out of his stupor, "...yes?"

"Natasha's calling everybody in. She has some big news." 

"Okay, be there in a minute."

He thanked the nurse and shuffled on his feet towards their room. Everybody except Steve was already there, sitting in various places, never next to each other. What a team they were, Tony huffed in amusement and sat down at his usual spot. Who would have thought Fury would have such bad luck in picking a team for a project as important as this. No wonder the media had been riding his ass mercilessly for a couple of weeks now. There was no hiding the kind of trouble Loki was causing. People were afraid the androids would rebel, the sales of replicants dropped drastically, people started building in safety precautions into their androids such as system cleaners, destruction modules. SHIELD had trouble processing all of the notifications about misbehaving replicants. It was crazy. The big three, Stark-Oscorp-Asgard, had fire under their asses, they bent over backwards to make their clients feel safe, but it didn't work. Public debates started up again; sadly the replicant-allies seemed fewer in numbers than ten years ago when the last big debate on replicant rights sprung up. It looked like Loki's approach didn't make humans happy. But Tony wasn't sure if Loki cared about what humans thought at all. Probably not. He probably cared about what Thor thought. Tony looked at him as Thor disinterestedly watched the news that always played on mute on one of the screens at the back. What did Thor think about the whole debate?

Tony moved to sit beside him, not to talk, not now, when everybody could hear and Tony would not get a real answer, but just to play with the energy they had going in the room. Who knows, maybe in Romanova's next report there would be a note that he and Thor were best pals now. Thor glanced at him but didn't say a word.

They hadn't been waiting long when Rogers finally showed up. 

"Okay, let's get it started. Natasha?"

Romanova stood up and the lights dimmed, on the biggest screen in the room appeared a plan of an old subway line. 

"I've successfully put a tracking chip on one of the androids we fought today, this is where it stopped two hours ago." Tony's heart started beating rapidly, they found Loki. It was over. 

"It hasn’t moved since. We've sent an agent there to see if it wasn't just that somebody had noticed the tracker and dropped it, but no. This abandoned subway line is where Loki is hiding." The image disappeared before Tony could memorize what it looked like for future reference. He felt as if Romanova had done it on purpose. She never trusted him, with good reason, Tony was man enough to admit that. "We attack tomorrow, before he has time to move again. Be here at 0600 sharp. We'll go over the plan and set out immediately. Time to finally catch that bastard."

Tony did his best to contain his panic. And he should not be panicking, no. This job had taken a lot more time than necessary, he should be glad the whole thing had finally come to an end. But the cold dread in his stomach did not fade. It was ridiculous, he should be happy, but he knew perfectly why he wasn't and it made him even more scared. What if they found out? Found out about... No. He had been careful about everything. He spoke to no one, except Thor, about Loki more than it was necessary, he always set the cameras on loop when he wanted to talk with Thor about him, he never left anything on the computers in the Hub. And he was sure no one else besides Loki had been in his home. J would inform him if somebody broke in, like he had done that time Loki was waiting for him. And he always took a different route home, stayed whole nights at bars or at a one-night stand's place when he was followed. There was no way they _knew._ But some of them probably suspected. Romanova for sure, she was the best at her job after all, Barton wasn't stupid either, just pretended to be, and Rogers probably thought the worst about him anyway so...

Tony got a hold of himself as Barton approached him, "Smith, I talked to Fury. You can bring your gauntlet and boots only if you let him play with them first. Leave them here for the lab and take them back in the morning."

"Not happening."

"Then I guess it's only standard uniform and blaster for you. Like for the rest of us kids."

"Not happening."

"It's your funeral, man."

He itched to leave but that would be suspicious. He hated this entire situation. He should have stayed at home, never returned Fury's call. But he was bored, and he thought working with SHIELD again might provide with a little thrill. And he hadn't been wrong about that. 

"I think I shall go home then, if we are to meet so early in the morning."

Thank the heavens for Thor. 

"Yup, I'm going too, see you guys tomorrow."

He left the building walking slowly, as if there was nothing wrong, and as soon as he got out he mixed in with the crowd. Years of practice had taught him that crowded streets were a blessing and he should take advantage of them whenever he could. Crowds saved his hide on numerous occasions, they fed him during worse periods in his life, made sure he had money to buy a ticket to the cinema when he was a kid. But years of living in solitude made him unaccustomed to constantly having people all around him. It was a blessing with a price. He winded the streets in the City aimlessly for at least two hours before he gathered the courage to call J.

"Send me all plans of pre-Kumar era Subway lines. Do we have anything that would suggest where Loki might be hiding? Anything he mentioned? Mud on his boots, that sort of stuff.."

"I'll go over the recording of his visit, sir, and inform you on everything I find."

"You do that."

Meanwhile Tony went to the last place he had seen Loki - the Junkyard. He gave Earl, who had been the owner since as long as Tony remembered, thirty Chin-Yens and walked in. It was pointless, there was no way Loki was here, but Tony had nothing better to do so he wondered between piles of junk. 

When J sent him the plans he sat down and went through them, but they all looked the same to him. 

"Fuck," he muttered. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!"

He had hoped kicking some weird looking piece of junk would make him feel better, but he only hurt his leg. Tony and his team were going to attack Loki's hideout in less than ten hours and he had no way of warning him. This day sucked. It seriously did.

* * *

They all showed up right on time, all dressed in their uniforms with full gear. It felt surreal, Tony had participated in numerous arrests, some of them demanded a bigger team, some of them were fairly easy and he did them on his own or with a partner. But he had never arrested someone whom he... didn't want to arrest. The tension in the room was hard to bear so Tony tried his best method at reliving it: stupid jokes. But except for Barton no one had joined in. He had anticipated at least Bruce, but he was surprisingly quiet all morning through the debriefing. And worryingly pale. Of all the people on the team it was only Bruce who he honesty liked so Tony walked over and elbowed him in the ribs. 

"How are you doing? Need some coffee? Do you want me to hold your hand?"

Bruce shook his head.

"Come on, give me something. Are you worried something'll happen to me? Is that it? Does your heart flutter at the very-"

"Oh, shut up you idiot," he laughed.

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting you?" asked Romanova from her place in front of the room. "As I was saying, yellow team will approach from the west, that is they'll enter from this entrance and move slowly towards the target...."

"So what is it?" Tony whispered.

"I'm.... I'm coming with you, Tony?"

"You? Why? You have no combat training, you're a science guy. Fury's not that desperate..."

"Let's just say I have a special ability that Fury's been saving up for a special occasion."

Tony whistled. "You make it sound so kinky, I barely can keep my pants on."

"You're an idiot."

"I guess that's true."

They wrapped up and boarded the jets. It was show time. And Tony still hadn't decided what he was going to do. He was expected to fight, to kill and capture every replicant he met. But after meeting Loki, after meeting Yinsen, he didn't think he could. He understood them, why they were doing this. Sure, they'd picked a crappy way to do it, but still. And it didn't feel like destroying a _thing_ anymore. But a lot of them weren't exactly innocent. Most of them killed people during their escapes. Loki had killed a lot of people. _What about revenge? You understand that too, don't you?_ Tony sighed. It wasn't like he could just leave, or switch sides. He was just fucked, thoroughly fucked. 

They landed a few blocks away from Loki’s base. Then they divided into groups and went inside. The special forces in the front, and their team in the middle. Tony for his part just wished he could lose them inside so there would be no uncomfortable questions.

In the end he opted on pretending to fight rather poorly, so he wouldn't damage his opponents too much, but still felt like shit for doing it. But the fact that they were not holding back helped his conscience a little. He determinedly pushed forward in hopes to find Loki and.... do something. 

He was hiding behind a pillar when he heard a terrible, hair-raising roar. And then loud footsteps and screams sounded. What in the world was that? He peaked at the corridor but it was empty. The footsteps were getting nearer. Tony powered up his gauntlet and reloaded his gun. Whatever it was, he was ready. Suddenly a giant green beast ran right in front of him. Tony gaped.

"What the-"

He leaned out of his hideout after the beast. It was so huge it barely fit into the corridor, Tony had never seen someone so big. And no one so _green._ He wracked his brain for possible identification but came up with nothing. It was so bizarre, something like this would be very hard to hide unless you tried really hard- and unless you were SHIELD. Tony picked up his gun and started walking slowly after the monster. And then it hit him. Bruce. The way Romanova always seemed to keep a close eye on him, their conversation this morning...Tony had heard before about his accident, but thought he just fully recovered. But he didn't. There was no recovering for something like that. Gamma radiation either killed you or seriously fucked you up.

The road after Bruce was unsurprisingly clear, with a few bodies lying here and there, but Tony avoided looking at them. He only glanced to check if one of them were Loki. And he found him a little bit further on, where the corridor widened and changed into a chamber. He was lying on the floor, a pool of violet substance surrounding him. His eyes were open, staring at some point on the ceiling. Tony's heart started hammering in his chest. He took few tentative steps towards him and then heard it. Labored breaths.

"You bastard," he spat out in relief.

Loki's lip twitched. "Were you worried about me?"

Tony kneeled next to him, ignoring the violet substance in favor of taking a good look at him. Loki's gaze focused on him. Tony noticed just how terrified he looked.

"I was hoping you were dead."

"Liar."

Tony helped him sit up and took a look at his back and swore.

"That bad, huh?" 

"It's not pretty."

Loki leaned on him and tried to stand up. Tony did his best to help him, but he had no idea how to go around doing it and ended up with his hand on Loki's crushed back and started freaking out in his head. Loki gritted his teeth in pain and Tony felt like the biggest asshole for wondering about how they'd achieved to create such a sophisticated nerve system that he could feel pain. 

"Dr Banner wasn't very gentle with me." 

"So it really was him," Tony asked just to distract himself from the feeling of the sticky violet substance that covered his hands.

"Oh yes. After his accident he started changing into... _that_ every time he was under influence of intense emotions. SHIELD has been keeping him docile and under their careful watch. They must have thought this was the perfect occasion for a test run."

"Can he stop it?"

"No. He cannot. He has no control of what is happening to him." 

They slowly moved towards the far end of the room, Loki leaning on Tony, and Tony trying to not do any more damage as he supported him.

"And where are we going?"

Loki stopped and watched him intently, then seemed to make up his mind and said, "There's a way out that's not on any document. It leads to a sewage a few blocks away from here."

"Great. Lead the way."

They shuffled towards a rusted door and when they got there, Tony propped Loki against the wall and pried it open. It was dark on the other side of the door but Tony's repulsor provided them with just enough light to see where they were going. They walked and walked, and it was getting dirtier and damper with every step they took. Finally, after what felt like forever they reached a ladder that led to an exit in the ceiling. They went up, first Loki then Tony, and found themselves, just like Loki said, in an alleyway a couple of blocks away. 

"Listen, I can't go father with you. I have to get back. But wait for me at my place, okay?" Loki stared at him without a word. "I'll meet you there as soon as I can. Can you walk that far on your own?"

"Yes."

"Great. Yes. Then I'll.... just be there, okay?"

"They'll start wondering where you are."

"Yeah, I should go. Just -" Tony raised his hand to - he wasn't sure what he wanted to do but he ended up squeezing Loki's shoulder and making an awkward exit. 

* * *

This time he didn't have to come up with an inventive way of breaking into the hotel. The door opened before him when he was a few steps away from them. He stumbled inside and cringed in pain when his weight rested on his left foot. 

"Is there a place where I could lie down?" he asked the AI that was in charge of all machinery in the building. It had never spoken to him, but Loki was well aware of its existence.

"Room thirty on the seventh floor is in a fairly good condition. I would recommend you, sir, to take it."

"Thank you. And call me Loki."

"As you wish, Loki."

"And what is your name?"

"You can call me J."

"Nice to meet you, J."

"The pleasure is all mine, Loki. I'll inform Mr Smith of your arrival."

He nodded and shuffled down the corridor on the seventh floor and walked into the room J pointed out for him. It was in a pitiful state. Everything was covered with a layer of dust, the air was stale and uncomfortably dry and for a moment Loki wished his creators weren't as thorough in creating him, just so he could be spared the awful experience of breathing in this room. But there was nowhere else he could go. His base had been destroyed, his allies too. And he was in no state to fend for himself much longer. Sadly his creators hadn't thought of things like adrenaline or loss of consciousness. Instead Loki had to bear the pain and watch his body slowly break down. He stumbled towards the bed and lay down on his stomach, ignoring the dust. A sour substance filled his mouth. He spat it out and then touched his lips. He had seen his 'blood' around a million times now, yet it never ceased to fascinate him. Looking at it made him feel more alive, aware of his body, of his very existence. 

It was his blood that made him realize something was wrong with him. That maybe he wasn't as human as his family was. He was wandering around the house, bored out of his mind when he walked into the kitchen. Due to his fascination with history he had recently watched an old movie with a knife thrower in it, it wasn't particularly good but it was fascinating to see what people considered entertainment centuries ago. So when he walked into the kitchen with that movie on his mind he had this childish idea to try knife throwing for himself. So he got out all of the knifes and went to the garden. Then he selected a tree and started throwing. It had been surprisingly fun, and he wasn't too bad at it. But when he was just starting to get good he cut the inside of his palm. And then he saw it, a violet substance trickling down his hand instead of the red blood he had been expecting to see. Loki remembered the confusion he felt and the irrational (or at least he had thought it was irrational) fear somebody would find out. Find out something was wrong with him. So he hurried back to the house and did his best at dressing his wound. For the next few days he kept wearing shirts with long sleeves, he stretched the sleeves of all of his jumpers so they would cover his hands. But the wound wasn't closing. He kept _bleeding_ and there were no signs of healing. But he remembered falling down from a tree and breaking his leg... or maybe it was Thor? He had gotten injured before. He and Thor had gotten into a lot of trouble during their childhood, Frigga used to call them her little rascals. He was sure every time he got injured before, there was blood, red blood. And he always healed. Always.

He was too scared to talk with anyone about this so he kept wearing long-sleeved pieces of clothing and avoided showing his hands to anyone. And he never touched the knifes. Never.

And then Odin threw a little party, to celebrate the newly created cooperation between three industrial giants: Oscorp Industries, Stark Industries, and Asgard Enterprise. His memory of all parties before that one was hazy, he remembered a little bit of dancing, delicious food, and being constantly ignored. That one was entirely different from what he remembered. It felt as if he were in the center of attention, everybody wanted to talk to him, he was constantly complemented on his intelligence and looks. They made him feel like the most interesting thing in the room.

He knew now, that they made him feel like the most interesting thing in the room because he _was_ the most interesting _thing_ in the room. Their complements were not directed to him, they were directed towards his creators. They were delighted with his wit because they hadn't expected him to have any character. So much later, he realized Frigga had been absent through the whole thing. There wasn't a trace of her anywhere in the house. Because she was dead at the time. But that he had found out much, much later.

It was the moment he understood what was happening to him. What he was. In one of his trips around the house (there were so many of them yet he never questioned his inability to leave the house) he had wandered to Odin's study. Since his father wasn't home he decided to use this occasion and rummage through his things. He had not done much snooping around before he found, on the top of Odin's desk, curious designs. One of them was a design of his face. With dread in his heart he looked through them carefully. And part of him knew, he always knew, deep down. He left all of the documents just as he had found them and avoided everyone else for the rest of the day. Then came the dreams. He always had them, he always dreamed about being held in a laboratory about being an experiment, and about being someone completely else. He never talked with anyone about those dreams, they always left him reeling, each morning for the first few hours after waking up, he felt... off. Like a stranger in his own body, in his own mind. But that morning, on the day following his discovery it all made sense. These dreams.... they were memories and they were real. 

He walked down for breakfast that day without a plan to attack Odin, but when he was walking by his office he heard him talk with Thor on the phone.

"Your mother and I are going on a trip to K-49 for Christmas, since we're all alone this year."

 _Alone. Your mother and I._ In that moment something snapped inside him. He waited for Odin to finish his call and walked into the study.

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"About what?" Odin asked without even raising his head to look at him. 

"About me. About what I am."

That made him look up with realization written on his face. "No. You weren't supposed to know."

"Why?!" he felt as if someone ripped his heart from his chest. He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream, he wanted to hide under his bed and never get out.

"I didn't want you to feel any different."

"You didn't want me to- You were there! You saw! You saw.... everything," his voice wavered. There were tears running down his cheeks, and he hadn't even noticed when he started crying. The beating of his heart was deafening. He was shaking all over in repressed fury; he itched to do something, to break something, to make Odin feel exactly how he felt. But he was well aware he never could make him feel like Loki felt, there was nothing he could do to make him feel all that anguish, the betrayal, the feeling of a child's broken heart. "I don't believe you."

"I've decided what was best for you."

"Best?" he sniggered. "What was best... for me." 

And he could not take it anymore. He let all his anger take control and leaped across the desk with his hands outstretched to grasp at Odin's throat. They tumbled to the ground, Loki squeezing Odin's throat who was desperately trying to pry his fingers off, but Loki was stronger. He held on to Odin’s throat as he started batting his head against the floor..It took three bodyguards to finally stop him. He killed two of them, but there were more of them just outside the room. He had no other choice, he had to flee. He wandered the streets confused and lonely for hours until he had formed a plan. He was going to make them pay. He was going to make them all pay. 

When he became aware of his surroundings again his face was wet and he wasn't alone in the room.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"I- umm... long enough?"

Loki propped himself up and turned to face Tony. He looked horrible. There were bruises and cuts all over his face, blood dried under his nose, his uniform was torn in a few places, and Loki knew from experience tearing SHIELD uniforms wasn't an easy thing to do. He was standing awkwardly in the threshold and looked everywhere but at Loki. 

"Is there something I can do?"

"I know someone who can make me... as good as new," Loki twisted his lips in distaste after saying that. 

"Good. Good. Cause I have no idea how to do that. Yet. I could find out... if you wanted me-"

"No need."

"Oh, good," Tony breathed in relief.

"I'm going to call her and then you're going to fetch her. I suppose you would rather she didn't know where exactly you live."

"Yeah, that sounds like a good plan. I can pick her up."

"J, could you please call the number three-one-one-two-five-eight-four-nine-two."

"Of course, Loki."

Tony looked at him incredulously. 

"I thought you didn't know about him."

Loki couldn't help but feel smug. "There are many things I am aware of."

"This better be good." Helen Cho's voice filled the room.

"Hello Helen, I'm afraid I found myself in a quite uncomfortable situation. I would be eternally grateful if you would help me out."

"How bad is it?"

"It's been...." he looked questioningly at Tony.

"Six hours."

"It's been six hours since the accident. I cannot move my legs, the upper body functions are slowly failing too. I seem to be losing an awful amount of blood-" He cringed at his own word choice. 

"Tell Niobe she can pick me up at the usual place in an hour. In the meantime stay where you are, don't move."

"I wouldn't dream of it."

The call disconnected and they were left staring at each other. 

"Who's Niobe?"

"A friend."

"Is she..."

"Dead? Yes."

"I'm sorry."

"Helen will be waiting at the corner of Tylor and third. It's not far from here, actually, twenty minutes walking."

"Right." The silence stretched uncomfortably. Tony looked down and noticed the bowl he had been holding this whole time. "I brought water. I thought maybe you would like to wash all that stuff off. Since you know... gross."

"I'm astonished by the infinite amounts of tact you possess."

"Actually, I think that's my best quality, you know."

Tony moved closer and handed Loki the bowl and a piece of cloth. He tried to take it but his hands shook too much and he spilt almost half of the water.

"Oookay. That wasn't a good idea. Here, let me," he sat down next to Loki and raised a hand with a wet cloth to Loki’s forehead. "May I?"

Loki nodded and Tony started wiping his face with care. Loki focused on the feeling of cold cloth touching his skin so he would not think about the pain he still felt in his upper body. He watched Tony's creased in concentration brows, his disheveled hair, bags under his eyes, his slightly parted lips. 

"What does J stand for?"

"What- ah," he smiled sheepishly but still hadn't looked Loki in the eyes. "Actually it's J.A.R.V.I.S. Just A Rather Very Intelligent System. Can you tip your head back so I can umm-"

Loki smirked and did as he was asked. Tony wiped his neck delicately, he moved Loki's hair to the side and it felt surprisingly pleasant. No one had ever touched him before with such care, no one except Frigga.

"Why won't you look at me?"

"I am looking at you."

Loki raised his hand and lifted the other man's chin. Tony stopped and slowly met his eyes.

"I let it happen, I helped them do it. I don't believe it's right to treat you guys like this... but I didn't do anything. I don't even know what's going to happen to those we caught."

"Depends on their owner. Some will be wiped and will continue working, but some will be destroyed, they'll inject them with a virus that will wreck their system and then they'll burn their bodies. That's how it's done."

Tony thinned his lips and wrung the cloth needlessly.

"You were doing your job, I don't blame you."

"Well, I blame me," Tony said and started wiping blood away from Loki's hand.

"You are so preoccupied with what's right and what's wrong.," he couldn't wrap his head around it, how could somebody depend so much on the sense of morality? So dependent on something so unstable.

"You don't seem to care about things like that at all."

"Because I don't. Everything is a subject to somebody's point of reference. Everything is right and wrong at the same time. I find it pointless to muse over this distinction."

Tony traced the bones of Loki's hands with the tips of his fingers. Loki could barely feel it, just like he barely felt pain anymore. But it still made him feel like someone gripped his throat and squeezed. He couldn't tear his gaze away from their touching hands. 

"I wish I could be as immoral as you."

"Do you, really?"

Tony huffed and let go of his hand. Loki didn't regret that loss one bit. Not at all.

"I should go pick up your friend."

"Well, I'll be waiting here then."

Tony barked with laughter and shook his head. Then he took the bowl and cloth away and left. Loki committed the feeling of fingers on his skin to memory. 

* * *

After he had provided Helen with clean water and a few towels Tony had left the room and he hung around outside of it, unable to do anything else. During that time he heard the wiz of a saw, some indefinable breaking sounds that made his blood run cold, but he didn't go in. First of all because Loki had asked him not to, and second because he wasn't sure if he could stomach seeing somebody's back split open. Seeing it battered and broken once was enough. The fact that Loki was an android probably saved his life. No human could survive that amount of damage done to one's body. 

After an hour or so he couldn't take it anymore. Pacing brought him no comfort, neither did drinking, or counting holes in the atrium's glass ceiling. 

So he passed the empty hotel rooms on the way back to his workshop, which he had put in one of the two biggest salons of the ballroom. It was a huge room that turned very cold each winter, but thankfully winter didn't last very long in the Calif District. And since he got tired of going up to the Presidential suite he had been living in for the first few months after he had discovered the hotel, he had moved a bed into the adjoined room and began to turn it into his bedroom. He rarely wandered around the hotel, he had visited every room and collected everything that could be of use at the very beginning. Then, after a few run-ins with other local squatters he installed his very own security system along with Jarvis, who had become the head of it. After that he only walked his regular route: workshop-kitchen-exit, and didn't feel inclined to stray from it. Actually it was entirely possible it was only the second time he had been on the seventh floor. 

He spent the rest of the time Helen Cho had been in the building distracting himself with making a helmet to go with his boots and gauntlet. Designs, calculations, and forging made waiting more bearable. 

When she was leaving it was already after dawn. At this point Tony no longer cared if she knew how to find this place, he needed to see Loki. He let her see herself out and walked into Loki's room. 

He was sleeping on his stomach; he was naked from the waist upward and with his back bare Tony could see there was no mark on it. No blemish that would indicate just few hours ago he was gravely injured. Good as new. 

It was hard to associate the force who had awakened something in Replicants all over the Earth, who made SHIELD agents run around like headless chickens, gave every news reporter a job, and made Osborn and Stark crap themselves in fear, with the man sleeping in a dusty room of a ruined hotel on the very outskirts of the city, as far from every Enclave as possible. He looked so soft, pliable. So normal. So vulnerable. 

Tony shouldn't be there. He really shouldn’t. It was creepy. Creepy and weird. He should leave. And that's what he did, but not without one last look at Loki's sleeping form.

Two hours later Loki walked into Tony's workshop while he was testing Jarvis' connection with the helmet. They were getting close to solving the problem with the feed, which was lagging all the time. 

"You should build the rest of it."

"The rest of what? J, switch to thermal vision." He waited a moment for Jarvis to catch up but nothing happened.

"Your armor. Isn't that what it was supposed to be?" 

"That was the initial idea, but armor's too conspicuous. It was more of a fantasy, really. J, let's check targeting system again," the HUD blinked and a wall of code appeared on it. Damn it. He thought he got it this time. "After I get this over with I'll make it look like a standard shield helmet for the special troops, no one will tell the difference." 

Jarvis rebooted the system and finally ran the thermal vision. Tony turned around to look at Loki. Huh. He was slightly colder than a human would be, but still warm. Tony filed that piece of information for future reference.

"And back to normal, J."

All of the holes were being patched up by Jarvis at great speed so this time the change came more quickly and Tony could finally take a good look at Loki. He was wearing a mole-eaten hoodie with the sleeves pushed up over his elbows and a pair of trousers that didn’t fit. He looked... odd in these clothes. Out of place.

"We have to find you something better to wear. J can place an order and I can pick it up on my way back from SHIELD today.

Loki frowned. "I thought you..." he paused and then continued in a forced light tone. "Don't you get a day off after closing the case?" 

"The case's not closed. They know you're not dead." 

Loki nodded. "We're going to have to do something about that. I am going to do something about that."

"And what do you want to do next?" 

Loki looked at him warily. It hurt more than it should.

"Come on, I think I've already proven I am not your enemy." 

"You're not my ally either."

This guy, honestly. As if Tony hadn't made it clear which side he was on. He took the helmet off and stepped closer to Loki. "I want to know what they know. I- listen, what I said yesterday I mean it. I'll help you, I'll do whatever it takes but this time, we'll do it the smart way."

"You mean your way," Loki said in an amused tone and Tony immediately felt lighter.

"Exactly, the smart way. No maiming, no killing. We'll make the masses think in our favor." 

The amusement disappeared from Loki's face as he laughed bitterly. 

"Do you think I am so clueless? Do you think I haven't thought about it? About a peaceful way, about changing people? Oh Tony, I am not as naive as you. Humans will never think of us as equals, they'll always see us as things, toys, slaves. With individual exceptions, of course. But nevertheless, the majority, the masses won't stand on our side. Your kind had so many troubles accepting some of your own, acknowledging the humanity of _humans_ has been a problem of your kind for centuries. Do you really think they would ever accept my humanity?"

"You'll make them. You've convinced me."

"You're a fool."

"Maybe I am. Or maybe you are."

"You think you can waltz in and save everyone?" Loki leaned in and gripped his arms tightly, a bit too tightly. "You think you understand how it is to be me so well. Then listen closely, there is no possible future where I forgive your kind for what they've done to mine, and there is no possible future where they forgo the power over those like me, there is no possible future-"

The grip on his arm was getting tighter and tighter and soon it got too tight. "Loki."

"Where you -"

"Loki, you're hurting me."

The replicant let go of him immediately and took a step back. He closed his eyes and took a deep shaky breath. 

"Listen, I think-"

"You'll be late for the debriefing."

Oh hell no, he didn't. Tony would not be dismissed so easily. "It can wait. What I want to say is-"

"We don't want to raise any suspicions."

"I'm always late, so there'll be no suspicions." 

"You may miss something important if you're late."

"For the first hour everybody's making coffee and complaining about getting out of bed. I don't think there'll be anything to miss."

Loki started moving back but Tony caught him by the elbow and stepped close so Loki would have no other choice but to look at him. Loki met his gaze with petulance. 

"We are going to do something about this. I'm going to help you."

"I want to make them pay. Are you ready to help me with that?"

That threw him off a little bit and he had no idea what to say, his mind was blank. That moment of hesitation was enough for Loki to slip away from Tony's grip. Without a word he turned around and left the room.

Tony swore and kicked a table. He really hated not knowing what to do. And right then he had no idea how to fix this whole mess. Everything was fucked up and he was right in the middle of it.

* * *

Loki was right, he really did arrive late to the Hub, but Tony was right too - the briefing room was full, but everyone was drinking coffee, finishing up breakfast, comparing reports. No one even noticed he wasn't there on time. He poured himself some coffee and sat down next to Thor who was nodding off in his chair. Tony took a folder from Thor’s lap and started skimming through it. 

It was a report of the battle. A very critical one. Huh. Someone was actually mad so many replicants were killed in the attack. The sentence where the writer called siccing Banner on them ‘ _a shameful act of cruelt_ y’ was underlined three times, the paper was even a little teared. Tony took a sip of his coffee and read on. Apparently there were many more effective ways of conducting the attack, ways that wouldn't have ended in so many casualties. Ways of which the command was informed about by the author of the report. 

Tony wondered what Fury would do to this guy after he received this. Somebody's going to be clearing their desk in no time. And Tony will be waiting for them, somebody who shares their views, who would show them all the ways they could contribute to putting an end to events like this. Maybe meeting this person would make Loki realize not all hope was lost. Tony sneaked a peak at Thor to see if he was still napping and continued reading. And oh boy, if they were angry at the way SHIELD handled the attack, they were furious when they found out about what had happened to the captured androids. They called it murder, even used the word 'inhumane'. Tony had to admit: writing a report like that required some serious guts. 

They would definitely need someone like that on their side. Tony skipped to the end to see the signature under the report and froze. 

Captain Steve Rogers. 

It couldn't be. Tony closed the file and searched the room for him, but he was nowhere in sight. He looked at the signature again, thinking maybe he imagined it. But no, there it was, plain as day: Captain Steve Rogers. 

No.

And yet he held the proof in his hands. 

Tony felt like he was about to laugh out loud. What a team SHIELD had put together. One was harboring the target at home, another was writing reports full of righteous fury, and another one had such a complicated relationship with the target he had no idea whether he wanted to catch him or not. 

Suddenly someone plucked the report from his hands. 

"You shouldn't be reading this," Rogers said and sat down next to Tony with a steaming mug in his hand. 

Tony blamed lack of sleep, shattered nerves, and the last twenty-four hours in general for blurting out, "If you're so pro-replicant why do you work with SHIELD?"

Rogers didn't look at him as he answered. "I believe in equal rights for everyone, not in letting murderers run rampant through the streets."

"But he's fighting for-"

"He's not fighting for anything. He's taking revenge. Fighting for what you believe in is an act of bravery, that man is a coward."

"Ohhh, he would definitely not be happy with you saying that."

"I'm lucky he isn't here, then."

"Still," Tony waved his hand at the folder in Rogers' hand. "If SHIELD's doing this then how can you work for them?"

Rogers turned to look at him, "Why are _you_ so preoccupied with what I think about the treatment of replicants?"

"Maybe I share your beliefs."

"I don't think you're capable of that."

"What’s that supposed to mean?!"

"Nothing. I just have trouble picturing a man who killed Obidiah just because he had fired him, with someone who is capable of compassion."

It was all too much. Tony was exhausted. First the 'arrest', then Loki's injury, a sleepless night, and the fight this morning. He knew baiting Rogers wasn't a good idea, he knew some things were better kept secret. But he just had enough.

"Ever thought it might be slightly more complicated? Things may be different than they seem. Just like with you and SHIELD."

He sprang to his feet and went to another side of the room so he wouldn't say anything stupid and ruin things even more. He didn't want anyone looking into the arc reactor, the tentative truce he had with SHIELD was dangerous enough. Tony already knew what happened when he shared his secret with people he thought he trusted. Especially those who could easily find a way to use it. After killing Stane he had made a decision and planned to stick to it: he was taking this secret to his grave. It wasn't like he had to wait too long for that to happen. He already had a plan ready, when the pain would get too much to bear, when his body would start to fail him, he'd destroy the arc reactor, and leave no scrap, nor record behind. He'll choose his time of dying. Maybe he'd call Rhodey and not say goodbye. Maybe he’d just get impossibly drunk. The world was full of possibilities after all. Maybe Loki'd be there, maybe he'd even be sad about Tony dying. Maybe.

* * *

Since SHIELD had no idea what had happened to Loki, where he was or even if he was at the base during their raid Tony wasn't particularly needed at the HUB. The facial recognition program was running twenty-four seven, teams of agents were sent out with Loki's picture in their pockets to knock on doors, ask if anyone had seen him. There were posters on the streets, on the news, on-line. Everywhere. But obviously they'd found nothing. That, and Tony's faked leg injury made it possible for him to stay at home for days.

After the talk they had had on that first day they avoided the subject out of unspoken mutual agreement. They spent their days in the workshop, Tony tinkering with his new helmet, Loki sometimes helping, sometimes meditating on the couch in the back. When Tony had asked what was he doing he had said he was _cleaning up a mess inside his head_ and offered no other explanation. At first it was weird, having him sit there for hours at a time, with his eyes closed, still as a statue, but Tony got used to it, and Loki never seemed to mind the noise he was making all the time so it wasn't like he had any right to complain about how _silent_ Loki was being.

Besides, it was nice, having someone around except Jarvis. They didn't always need to talk, they could just be. There were no forced conversations, no pleasantries, no expectations. Just companionship. And Tony had no idea how much he had been missing having another person he could just hang out with. 

So when he was making himself a coffee it felt only natural to make a second one for Loki and bring it to him. Tony put one mug on the ground somewhere in the vicinity of where Loki's legs would be if he had been sitting like a normal person instead of cross legged like a giant pretzel and sat down next to him. He leaned on the armrest and waited for the other man to open his eyes. But Loki seemed adamant on ignoring him which surprisingly was... fine. Tony was content with drinking coffee and watching him. And there definitely was something to look at. It wasn't only Loki's personality that Tony found... captivating. There was no denying he was quite easy on the eyes. Especially dressed in clothes that fit. Tony had brought him some with a bit of help from Jarvis who turned out to be surprisingly good at dressing people. The clothes Tony had brought made Loki look real, approachable, touchable.

"I don't think it was a conscious decision on their part," the android murmured.

"Wh-what?"

"When you make something why not make it beautiful?"

Busted. But Loki didn't seem to mind it too much.

"I guess you're right."

Silence fell again, but Tony couldn't let their little exchange go. There was this urge inside him, to say something, to make Loki react to him.

"Maybe I don't find you beautiful."

Loki turned towards him with a raised brow. And wow, Tony really shouldn't find smugness that attractive. He really should just stop. This wasn't a good idea. 

"Fair enough. But you can't blame me for that. It's a natural reaction."

"Of course," Loki said with mock seriousness.

"Oh fuck you, you asshole," Tony kicked him lightly in the thigh, but the bastard acted as if he didn't even feel it. "Besides, you're totally enjoying the attention."

"Oh do I? Do I enjoy being ogled? Let me think for a second..." he tapped one of his long fingers on his thin lips. And Tony should focus on something else. It was much better when Loki was just a figure that popped up from time to time to taunt their team and then disappeared, leaving Tony with nothing but a bunch of videos to obsess over.

"I did not ogle you," Tony bristled. "There was never any ogling going on. None whatsoever."

"Of course not. So how would you call it? Appreciation maybe?"

Tony snorted in disdain to hide just how close to home Loki was hitting. "There's nothing to admire."

"So that's what it was. Admiration," Loki purred and Tony gulped.

"You think too highly of yourself."

"Oh do I?" 

And Tony didn't like that tone. Not one bit. Oh hell. He couldn't even lie to himself now. He definitely did. 

Tony hummed in agreement. Suddenly Loki turned to him and plucked the coffee out of his hands. He put it on the ground and started crawling up Tony's body, causing him to lean back. He moved slowly, looking at him intently, never breaking eye contact. And Loki did have beautiful eyes, normally it was hard not to look at them. In that moment it was impossible not to, they were full of promise that made Tony's heart beat faster. Loki's face was inches away from Tony's, their legs were tangled, there was little space between their upper bodies. Tony could feel the warmth of the other man's body, his breath on his lips. Loki touched his face gently and brushed Tony's lower lip with his thumb. He smiled when Tony opened them slightly. His mouth ran dry at the way Loki stared at his lips.

"I guess you're right. I have no effect on you whatsoever," Loki whispered and then he just moved back to his previous position as if nothing had happened. 

"Wha-" Tony propped himself to look at Loki incredulously. 

"I believe Jarvis has completed the test you ordered him to run."

"You can't just-"

Loki smiled smugly and closed his eyes, going back to his meditating pose, "Yes I can."

"Well it's not nice."

"I am not very nice, so it's okay."

Tony sloped back down and pressed the bases of his hands onto his eyelids. "You're such an asshole."

Loki chuckled. 

* * *

He was making final touches to the helmet when Jarvis interrupted him. 

"Sir, Colonel Rhodes is calling."

Tony's head snapped up. 

"Put him through."

Rhodey's face appeared on the screen. He looked tired, but then Rhodey usually looked like that when he was stationed somewhere. And he had been stationed on Asteroid 45632 a long time. Too long if you asked Tony, but Rhodey never did. And Tony never asked the question that he had been wanting to ask: are you avoiding me?

"You look awful." 

"Right back at ya. It's good to see you though. We haven't been talking much lately. How are things?"

Tony shrugged. "Same old. Nothing exciting to talk about. I've only made these boots with arc-reactor powered thrusters so I could fly in them but you know, it's nothing."

Rhodey laughed. "Just don't kill yourself in them."

"Seriously, they're awesome."

"I believe you, but it's a serious request Tony, don't die an idiot's death."

"How would that be an idiot's death? Dying during conducting a new invention is a noble death. It's every scientist's dream."

"An idiot in a pair of flying boots breaking his face cause he crashed into a wall is every scientist's dream? I don't think you've met real scientists, Tony."

"Well, that was just unnecessary."

"You think it was?"

"I know it was, you hurt my feelings."

"I think you'll live."

"I think I deserve an apology."

"You can make it up to me when I get back."

"And when are you getting back?" Tony asked, and the atmosphere got tense.

Rhodey sighed. "I don't know. It's hell in here. Every time we get the upper hand those bastards come up with another way to fuck us over."

Yeah. That must be... tough."

"Actually I'm calling to ask about a mess that's been going on at home. I've heard you have some replicant on a killing spree situation."

Shit. Tony had hoped this particular piece of news wouldn't reach Rhodey so soon.

"It was a bit of a problem, but it's okay now. He's dead."

"Really? How do you know? It hasn't been on the news."

Tony smiled at him sheepishly. "I might have agreed to Fury's proposition to re-employ me for this one case..."

Rhodey frowned in displeasure and pinched the base of his nose, "Are you kidding me? Tony, you know it's a terrible idea. You know what they really want from you. And next time I won't be able to help you. I can go against Stark Industries for you, but SHIELD would crush me and your lawyer's line of defense like a bug. You know what Fury wants from you. You should stay away from them."

"I know, but actually it was some other not so hidden purpose he needed me for. He wanted me to stir the waters a little bit so he could get both the blackmail material _and_ keep his reputation more or less clean. It wasn't the reactor he was after this time."

"What? What is going on Tony?" Rhodey asked in a deadpan voice. It was nice, seeing him act like this, like nothing had changed between them, like they hadn't been drifting apart for years now.

"Odin Gungnir is the owner of the android."

"Tony."

"What? I was bored and broke okay? No one wants to give me a job after Stane, and SHIELD didn't help."

"You could have called me-"

"It's done okay? The case is closed. Nothing bad happened. Let's move on."

Dum-e whirled closer with a chlorophyll cocktail in its claw. Tony took it and patted it on the corpus. 

"What is that? It looks disgusting."

Tony grinned and tried to look nonchalantly. "Ah you know, rubbing shoulders with Captain Rogers made me want to keep fit, see if I can have abs like that. Aren't you jealous of the company I keep?"

"Of Steve? I know him already, we've worked together few times."

Tony sagged and said in mock misery, "I'm afraid he hates me."

"Can you blame him though?"

"Not really, but it still hurts."

Rhodey got serious again, and just as Tony started hoping he had successfully distracted him. Guess years of being friends gave Rhodey some training at reading Tony.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm great."

"You don't look great. I'm worried about you."

"Awwww. Knew you had a soft spot for little old me."

"Yup. Those bags under your eyes charmed the pants off my ass."

"Don’t make it weird."

"I'm not making it weird. You're making it weird," Rhodey said but once again sobered. “Just tell me what's going on."

"There's nothing going on. Listen, I have to go, important stuff to get to. Call me anytime you miss my handsome face."

"Yours’s an ugly mug. Mine is handsome."

"Whatever you tell yourself in the morning," Tony said and disconnected the call. 

He sagged in his chair. He hated doing that, but there was nothing else to do. He couldn't possibly tell Rhodey: _And by the way, I'm harboring a wanted fugitive. I might have even helped him avoid arrest conducted by the team I am a part of. But anyway, how are you?_

"He doesn't know," Loki said from somewhere behind him and Tony jumped in surprise.

"Jeez, warn a guy. And no. He doesn't know."

"Why have you never told him?"

Tony turned around to look at him. He was leaning on one of the workbenches, outside of the camera's range. Whenever Loki wasn't in the workshop with Tony, he was wandering around the hotel, he said walking calmed him, but Tony thought it only made him broody.

"There never was a good time. Besides, how exactly would telling him help? He would worry all the time, and there's nothing to be done anyways so... I've checked all existing elements to see if the palladium could be replaced. It can't."

"It looked like he's worried already."

"Yeah well, he can deal with that. He thinks I'm just being a recluse, not that I'm dying. Can we stop talking about that? It's depressing, what I'd love to hear about is a new fascinating spider-web you've found today. How was it?"

* * *

It took Tony another two days to finally break the silence. He had been stalling for as long as he could. Making up excuses to not poke the dragon, but he just couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't wrap his head around the way Loki was behaving and it was slowly driving him crazy. The whole thing didn't add up. It was time he got some answers. He walked towards Loki who had been lounging on the couch, reading a book which Tony plucked from his hands and threw on the nearest table. Loki glowered at him.

"Why don't you want to at least try to do something? You just... gave up. I don't get it."

"I've decided it's not worth it. Would you please hand me back my book?"

"Not worth it?! Not worth- Even you couldn't change your mind so much. You know you can tell me if you're planning something."

"The only plan that I have seems to displease you. Forgive me for not sharing all the details." 

"But- you know you could change things. No. Listen me out. Not all people are like this, some just need to have their eyes opened. I'm not saying it'll be easy. I'm saying you can do it."

"You want me to start a painfully long process of social change, and I -" Loki laughed bitterly and that sound made Tony waver in his will to persuade him. "I would never see it through. I would never even -" he laughed again and it started to freak Tony out. His knees felt weak, so he perched on the free space next to Loki. That movement snapped him out of whatever that laugh was. "Do you know how this whole thing started? What I was looking for? I was looking for answers. Answers to three questions," he raised his fisted hand and started straightening his fingers one at a time with each thing he listed. "Morphology. Longevity. Incept dates."

"I... have no idea what that means."

"It means you're not the only one who's dying. We're quite a pair, don't you think?" He flashed a crazed smile and gripped Tony's arm. "Four years. This is my life span. Four short years and I die. Like you said. I've looked at all the ways to stop it, but there's nothing to be done. I don't know my incept date. But the four year mark has to be somewhere soon. I had been living with the Gungnirs about two years before breaking free. The tests run on me beforehand had lasted something around that number too. I remember the scientists wishing each other happy new year on two separate occasions."

"I- I don't know what to say."

"There's nothing to say. Now you can see the pointlessness of your proposal. There's a great possibility I would not be able to even start the movement you speak of. I am sorry to disappoint you." He smiled mirthlessly and leaned back away from Tony. "But this is not how I wish to spend my last days."

"You could still make a difference, at least try to," Tony's protest seemed feeble even to his ears.

"This is how you and I differ. It is not my wish to make the world a better place. I don't particularly care if it is or isn't easier for the generations to come. Don't you see? We are both dead men walking. The only thing we can do is enjoy the rest of our lives however we see fit."

"Just like that?"

"I thought that was what you were doing until you started talking about us changing the world together." 

"I thought that was something you wanted," said Tony defensively.

"It is something I would have wanted had I the time to execute that wish."

"You would want us to change the world together?" he teased and Loki smiled faintly.

"You seem like a decent companion."

"Huh. Thanks, it really warms my heart to hear you think so highly of me."

"I would hate _you_ to _think too highly of yourself_."

"Oh my god," Tony groaned and rested his head on his hands so he wouldn't have to look at Loki. Who was sitting very close, Tony had just realized. "Can we _please_ stop going back to that conversation?"

"I have no idea what conversation you mean."

"You know very well what conversation I mean."

"Was that a conversation? I was operating under a different assumption."

Tony's head raised itself at its own volition. He hated himself a little bit for reacting like that. "What assumption?"

Loki leaned in closely and Tony’s breath hitched. The bastard seemed to be hoping he did just that, because he smiled smugly and whispered in his ear, "I was under the impression it was just me being an asshole, isn't that what you said?"

Tony turned his head towards him, but didn't touch him because Loki was already leaning back with a self-satisfied smirk on his face.

"Why do you keep doing this? I don't think I deserve this. This is torture, you're torturing me, and now you're laughing at me. Fantastic. You know what, I'm going to sleep. You can sit here all by yourself now and think about my hurt feelings." 

"If you would be so nice and pass me my book on your way out, that would be lovely." 

Tony stood up and threw the book at him. Loki caught it with ease before it could hit him. Tony huffed in irritation. "I hate you, you know that?"

"Whatever you say."

"You're insufferable."

"I thought you were going somewhere."

Tony groaned in annoyance and left the room. That bastard. How could Tony let himself get so infatuated with someone like that? He shook his head. He knew very well how, or more likely _why_ he had become so infatuated with Loki. 

* * *

A few days after the attack on Loki's base, Tony was returning from a meeting at the HUB when he noticed Romanova trailing him. He noticed her completely by accident, he wasn't paying too much attention to anybody following him, because the last few visits she hardly even tried to trail him. Tony almost slapped himself on the forehead. He fell for such an easy trick. Good thing no one would know about it but himself. Honestly, part of Tony hoped they would just let go. He was tired of this unending charade of them trying to track him down, copy his technology, use him as a scapegoat, and him letting them do that because at least then something was happening in his life. He was just tired, and what Loki had said to him about not wanting to live his last days trying to do something he didn't feel like doing echoed in his mind. So he stepped into the crowd with the intention of losing her. But she was good. She had brought her A-game, and Tony had some serious trouble at shaking her off. 

He wavered through the crowds, went to a mall, got on a subway. He played all of his tricks. She was relentless. In the end he had to text Jarvis, so he would let Loki know what was happening, and stayed the night at various clubs, doing his best at losing her. Eventually sometime after three in the morning some douche had made it his life's goal to pick her up. Tony used the occasion presented to him and sneaked out while she was very thoroughly giving the guy a lesson on the importance of accepting rejection. He got in a taxi and drove off. He saw her run out of the club but it was already too late. She would never catch him.

It was odd, the persistence with which Romanova had followed him that day. Usually she would give up when he made it clear he was not going to lead her straight to his home. But today... today there was something determined in her pursuit. Or maybe she was just bored. But she wasn't like Tony, she was a full-time SHIELD employee, she had tons of things to do. She shouldn’t have been wasting her time following him from one dingy club to the other.

Tony's thoughts flew immediately towards Loki. What if he had let something slip? He thought back to their every encounter since he started harboring Loki, but there was nothing out of the usual. He was an exceptional liar, always had been. He didn't lose his cool, he didn't stumble, he never mixed-up the facts. 

It was something else. He didn't know what, but he was sure there was something. And it was better he found out what it was sooner than later. For both him and Loki.

* * *

When he got back Loki was on the second floor, leaning on a railing and looking down at the atrium. Tony climbed the stairs to join him.

"Did you miss me?" 

"Terribly. The whole night I was crying into my pillow."

"Obviously."

Tony leaned next to him and looked down too. He saw nothing interesting except a flowery mosaic, so he opted on looking at Loki. He looked tired, paler than usual. Tony couldn't help but feel good about that. He _had_ been missed. Not that Loki would ever admit it, but Tony didn't need him to. The silence stretched, neither seemed to be willing to speak. Loki was deep in thought, paying no attention to anything else. And Tony? Tony traced the angles of Loki's face with his eyes, the way his eyelashes rested against his cheeks, the way his hair was curling behind his ear, the way the corner of his mouth was slightly curling upwards because he was smirking, because of course Tony had been caught staring. Again. 

"So what were you up to?" 

"I've been thinking." 

"What about?"

Loki stayed silent for a moment, then he turned, so he was leaning on the rail with his side instead of front, facing Tony. There was a hesitant look on his face, as if he had made a decision but wasn't sure if he'd go through with it or not. Then he stepped closer and kissed Tony. 

It caught Tony by surprise, the momentum made him stumble backwards but Loki didn't let that separate them. Tony recovered from the shock quickly and buried his hand in Loki's hair, keeping him close. His other hand gripped the other man's hip and drew him closer. Loki bit at his lower lip and Tony groaned. Loki used that to slip into his mouth and Tony welcomed that progress with great enthusiasm. Seriously, days of thinking about this hadn't prepared him to just how much he would enjoy kissing Loki. He slipped his hand under Loki's shirt and smiled at the shudder it provoked. They parted, both breathing heavily. 

"Huh. I can finally see the appeal," murmured Loki against Tony's ear.

"Glad to be of help." 

Tony caressed the smooth skin of Loki’s back trying not to think about how it had looked like only a couple of days ago. Loki tilted his chin and kissed him lightly, then he pushed him back, so he had to take a few steps back until he hit a pillar. Loki kissed him again, simple mouth on mouth.

"I like this."

"I should hope so."

Before he could add something else Loki surged in and kissed him again. Not a chaste kiss, like the two before. No, this time he was licking, biting, and sucking with all he got. And Tony most gladly reciprocated. At some point Loki's hand ended up on Tony's stomach, his blunt fingernails scratching down. Tony moaned and arched his back.

"Shit."

Loki chuckled and sucked on the spot where Tony's neck and shoulder met. He seemed to develop an obsession with leaving bruises on Tony's neck. 

Tony slid his thigh between Loki's legs causing him to gasp against the wet spot he had left on Tony's neck. Loki gripped his hips tightly and rolled his hips against him. A broken moan escaped Loki’s lips. And holy shit, that sounded so hot Tony's mind just short-circuited. He gripped Loki's ass and pulled him forward. Loki moaned again and let Tony control his movement.

"Tony I -" he panted.

Tony chuckled and Loki bit his earlobe in response. Tony frowned in confusion when suddenly Loki stepped back. Did he do something wrong? He thought everything was going so well. Fantastic even.

But then Loki tugged the front of his shirt and said, "Come, I want to do this on your bed."

And how could Tony say no to that? 

* * *

Getting out of bed on the next day was the hardest thing he had done in weeks. He turned off his alarm clock and looked sideways. Loki peered at him with one eye, the rest of his face smashed against the pillow. His hair was messy and scattered around his head. He looked so soft and normal. It shouldn't make Tony's heart beat faster, but it did. 

"It's a shame," Loki drawled in a husky voice.

"What's a shame?"

"It looks like you're late for work again."

"I'm not- ahhh. Yup, I guess you're right. Terrible, I have to buy another alarm clock if it happens again."

Suddenly Loki was straddling him, his face inches away from Tony's. 

"It's truly horrible how things just sometimes let you down."

Tony smoothed his hands down Loki's thighs who in turn pecked him on the lips and stayed there, their lips not entirely touching, but brushing lightly.

"I guess it's not my fault," Tony murmured.

"I guess it's not."

Tony lifted his chin and kissed him, Loki hummed and returned the kiss. Tony flipped them and smirked at Loki's surprised face. 

"I don't think there's much to do anyways since our target is nowhere to be found."

Loki laughed and made a thoughtful face. "I wonder; where could he be?"

"Don't ask me, I wouldn't know the first thing about harboring a wanted fugitive."

Tony leaned in and tugged Loki's lower lip with his teeth while the other man started pushing his boxer briefs down. It really looked like he was going to be seriously late this morning. But getting the stink-eye from Rogers was totally worth staying in bed with Loki a little bit longer.

In the end he got to the Hub two hours later then he should have. There was nothing unusual about that, but what was unusual was the reaction he got when he walked into the team's shared room. 

"Oh hell no!" Barton yelled after had taken a glance at Tony. The rest of the team jerked away from what they had been doing to look at him. 

"Clint," Romanova snapped at him warningly.

The whole team was watching them now, and they all looked tense. 

"No. I know we have a plan, that's not working by the way, and we were supposed to be _cautious about this Clint._ But no way in hell I'm continuing this charade if he shows up like this!" Barton strode towards him and tugged Tony's collar down, exposing his bruised neck even more. Tony snapped his hand away and took a step back.

"What's your problem, man? You jealous or something? Go out and try to get some if it bothers you so much."

"Oh I just don't know if I'll be able to find myself a murdering psychopath to fuck. Could you give me some tips maybe?"

Tony's blood ran cold. His heart started hammering in his chest. He looked around to see the teams faces. Bruce was surprised, he stared at Tony in shock. Thor on the other hand seemed confused, if it was because he didn't know what to think about this or how had it happened Tony had no idea. Rogers' and Romanova's were both stone-faced, and blocking the only two exits for that matter. 

"What?" Tony blurted out. "What are you talking about?"

"Natasha shut him up before I punch him."

"Clint, step away from him. Tony, put your hand from behind your back, place the gun on the ground. We have you outnumbered."

Shit. He thought he had been sneaky. He slowly did as she asked.

"Just for curiosity's sake: what gave me away?"

"There's footage of you and Loki on the day of the raid on his base, you're helping him escape," Rogers said and shrugged after Romanova had given him a dirty look.

"Well, that's a really stupid slip."

"Take off your gauntlet," Romanova said.

"I'm not wearing it."

She raised her brow and looked pointedly at his wrist where a titanium wrist cuff was resting.

"That's jewelry."

"Then it shouldn't be a problem to take it off." 

"Sure, no problem," Tony made a big show of reaching towards it, his palm turned down, so they wouldn't think he was about to blast them. 

"Will you give it back? It's a family heirloom, you know?" he stalled.

"Take it off. Slowly," Romanova deadpanned.

"Everything's ready, sir," Jarvis said and startled the rest of the team.

The lights went out, Tony activated the gauntlet and grabbed his gun from the ground. Someone shot a tile next to his left foot. Tony fired with his gauntlet at the place where Rogers should stand and jumped over a desk. But then Romanova tackled him from behind. They rolled on the ground while the rest of the team scurried around the room. Tony would laugh at the sounds of confused agents colliding with each other if a very dangerous woman weren't pinning him to the ground. He shouldn't be wasting time, his only advantage was their confusion. If he couldn't get out of there in the next two minutes he wouldn't be getting out of there at all. 

"J, 10 percent," he said loud enough for Jarvis to pick up from the noise.

The light in his blaster dimmed between their bodies and he fired at Romanova's arm. She yelled in pain and released her grip on him. He threw her off and got on his feet.

"Three steps forward, then turn left and walk straight" said Jarvis and Tony did as he was told.

He stumbled on his way out on something that was probably Rogers, but regained his balance and ran out. 

The power in the whole building was out. Jarvis made sure to lock all agents in the rooms they were at the moment Tony had been confronted by his team. All doors opened before him, a voice in his earpiece told him where to go, how to avoid the few agents that had been locked in the hallways.

He ran out of the building and onto the busy streets. Quite a lot of people stopped and stared at the suddenly dark tower, but Tony had a lot of experience at mixing with crowds already so he quickly got rid of any puzzled looks. He took a really long and complicated way home.

* * *

The first day after Tony had come back, shaken and terrified, was a nightmare. Even though Tony had been extremely cautious not to leave any trail behind they were expecting SHIELD to come knocking on their door any minute. But they hadn't. Yet their sense of security had been lost, Tony checked the efficiency of all systems, connected Jarvis with all nearest cameras (and there were only few, Tony had made sure of that after he first moved in) and Loki spent extra time meditating, cataloguing all the memories that had been uploaded to his system, looking for something that might be useful for them. 

He had gotten quite good at chasing away the false memories and summoning them at will. He hardly ever got himself lost in his own head these days. Loki felt more like himself, like he was the owner and sole occupant of his mind. His thoughts were clear and sharp, and thankfully entirely his own. 

One of the days following Tony's denunciation Loki had woken up alone in the middle of the night. He frowned in confusion at the empty space in the bed.

"Tony?"

"In here!"

Loki slipped out of the bed, grumbling under his breath. The air was cold and he had been so comfortable under the covers. It had better be worth it or otherwise Tony would pay for not sleeping like a normal person should have been doing at that hour. 

Tony was bent over a table. He wore protective gear on his face and had a blow torch in his hand. Loki stepped closer and noticed a huge crate standing next to the workbench he was using that hadn't been there when they went to bed. 

"Remember when we talked about my armor and how it wasn't a good idea to make it?"

"Yes."

"Well, I've changed my mind. I'm going to use some of the Carbonadium I've got lying around and make it more of a... uniform. A suit. Made of light but resilient material. It's going to look amazing. You'll see," Tony turned around and grinned at him. The urge to return the smile was stronger than him, even though he was mostly confused, Loki smiled back.

"And it couldn't wait."

"Of course it couldn't. I had the idea now. I have to do it now."

Loki pinched the base of his nose, "Of course you do."

Tony rolled his eyes at him, "Look, you don't have to stay with me here, go to sleep. Cause if you're going to stay you'll have to make yourself useful. Have you ever used a soldering iron? If not that's okay, I'll teach you. You could help me with testing too. But you know, no pressure. It's totally okay if you want to go back to sleep." 

Even though the whole situation was just silly there was something that made Loki uneasy. Something that Tony wasn't telling him. He could tell by then that whenever Tony tried to hide something he distracted people with talking and busied himself with work. 

"Why are you making this suit?"

"Because it's a good idea. It's useful."

"How exactly do you plan to use it? I think we agreed on staying low. I'm too tired to- I don't want to fight anymore, Tony. I'm sick of unending struggle. I want to live the remainder of my days in peace, however many of these days I have left."

Tony stopped working and put his tools away. He wiped his hands on his t-shirt and came closer to Loki. Loki stared at him in confusion while he kissed him chastely and stroked his face. 

"What if you didn't have to die?"

"Don't be ridiculous. We both know it's coming."

"I know, I've seen the way your hands started shaking, don't think I haven't," Loki broke their eye contact and frowned. He hoped this little detail had skipped Tony's attention. Loki's body was slowly starting to fail him, the clock was ticking, if only he knew how much time he had left. "What if we talked to Stark?"

"To Stark? Stop being ridiculous, that man lives in the most secured place on Earth. I was planning to pay him a visit only when I had sufficient troops with me."

"Well, good thing you have me then."

"Not to insult your intelligence Tony, but I don't think you can just break into the Stark Mansion."

"I- let's sit down, okay? I have something to tell you."

Loki let him lead him towards the couch and sat down next to him. Tony sighed and ran his hand through his hair. His hesitation made Loki even more worried than he already was. Tony glanced at him but shifted his gaze away quickly. He stared ahead when he started talking.

"Remember when I told you about my accident? About how there was a family that wanted to adopt me?" he continued after Loki had hummed in agreement. "It were the Starks who were looking into adopting me. They were looking for another kid, for a _playmate_ for Arno. And we were the same age, both smart, I was even looking quite similar to him. Edwin Jarvis, the husband of the principle of the orphanage I grew up in, was Starks' butler. When Howard and Maria mentioned adopting somebody he convinced them it would be a good idea to take a boy from outside the enclaves in. Give him a chance at better life." Tony snorted in disdain. "But after the accident my... health problems ruled me out as a potential son. So they kind of left me here. Arno remembered me though, we really got along you know? We kept in touch, it was an on and off thing, but we did. And when I was looking for a job there was a place for me at Stark Industries."

"But you killed Obidiah Stane."

"But I killed Stane. He wanted to kill me first, you know? I told him about my arc reactor. Thought he was my friend, _my mentor._ He saw it as a way of getting free from Stark," Tony took a deep steadying breath before continuing. "I know the lay-out of the Stark Mansion by heart. I've been there countless times. And I think if I called Arno he would let me in. We have an ongoing chess match to finish."

"He would let you in? After you killed his business partner?"

"I think he suspected what had really happened, but had no way of proving it. Firing me was easier."

"So what are you saying is..."

"What I'm saying is that there is a chance to fix your problem. Let me finish my suit and we'll go to him."

Loki was stunned. In his wildest dreams he hadn't suspected this to be so easy. He had come to terms with his fate some time ago. Now when he was presented with a possibility of prolonging his life his head started swimming. He couldn't wrap his head around it. It was unwise to hope, but there was no stopping it now. Hope had wormed itself under his skin and he knew he wouldn't be able to suffer through disappointment again. If Tony's plan didn't work out Loki would lose his mind.

"Okay. We can go."

"Great. Now are you going to help me or not?"

* * *

It had taken Tony a few days to complete the suit. He took his time, made sure everything was in place, triple-checked every little part. No joint was out of alignment, no piece of coding was left untested. Hurrying made him feel as if he was expecting Loki to drop dead any minute, so he stalled. Loki didn't seem to mind, probably sensing himself that nothing would be the same after they had talked with Stark. But the time to go had to come eventually.

Since they both were fugitives now they had to come up with some way to break into Enclave C0 - the one where Stark Mansion was - without waking one of the many alarms placed on its borders. Luckily, Loki was able to deal with that. He had found a security blind spot with ease, and soon enough they were slipping into the enclave unnoticed. 

They navigated the street based on Tony's memory which was a bit hazy, but was all that they had. There were no plans of the enclaves released to anyone but their citizens. To find your way around them you had to ask the security guard at the entrance for instructions, or have your friend pick you up. On their way they passed enormous houses of rich people who still bothered with living on Earth, on a time to time basis, but still, some kept their connection to the home-world even though there were better planets where they could live. Tony wondered how it would be like to grow up in this place, play on the clean streets, walk among all these beautiful things every day. He would probably be someone entirely different.

They kept their heads low, pretended to be deeply engrossed in each other every time someone passed them. In reality they were both tense and anxious. If somebody were to catch them, or report SHIELD about their presence it would all be over. Tony would go to jail, Loki would be neutralized. But they got to Stark’s front door just fine. 

Tony rang the bell.

"Tony," Arno Stark said in his tired voice through the intercom. He didn't sound particularly surprised.

"Rook from A3 to D3."

There was a brief moment of silence before Arno spoke again, "I hadn’t thought you would choose that option."

"I like surprising you. Here's another: Can I come in? We have something to talk about."

Loki and Tony shared an anxious look while they waited for Arno to respond.

"I suppose that'll be all right. He can come too. I'm in my bedroom."

Oh. So he knew. But that was okay, they had thought about that too, actually. It wasn't like they were going to hide Loki's presence. 

The door opened and they walked in. It was dark inside, the air was stale and it made Tony sneeze. Like it always did when he was a kid. No one came for them, the whole of the staff was probably at home at this hour, so Tony lead Loki upstairs, to where he knew Arno's room was.

Tony's almost adoptive brother hadn’t changed much from the last time they saw each other, a few years ago, during Tony's trial. He still looked sickly and tired. He still had his father's sharp eyes that made Tony's skin crawl. Loki stopped before the entrance to the room but quickly walked in with confidence that Tony wasn't sure was fake or not.

"I'm surprised you didn't come here sooner."

"It's not an easy thing to meet your maker."

"And what can I do for you?" Arno asked, staring with fascination written all over his face.

"Death seems to be the problem. I want more life."

"I'm afraid that's not possible." 

Oh. Oh no. Tony bit his lip to stop himself from talking. This was not about him, this was not about that painful feeling of disappointment that had squeezed his insides. He watched as Loki's face fell, started moving towards him but stopped when Loki approached Arno and sat down next to him. Tony's hands itched to do something, but it was not his place, he had to remember that.

"Why not?" Loki whispered.

"A coding sequence cannot be revised once it's been established. Because by the second day of incubation, any cells that have undergone reversion mutation give rise to revertant colonies, like rats leaving a sinking ship; then the ship... sinks. You are our joined effort, we all did our best, as highly developed as it is possible for current times. You were made as well as we could make you."

"But not to last."

"No. Not to last."

Arno squeezed Loki's hand with his. Loki looked at it curiously. 

"Why make me?"

"Because we wanted to create something wonderful."

Loki snickered, "I've done some questionable things."

"Look at you, your life burnt quickly but so very brightly. You can feel it already, don't you? The end drawing nearer?"

"Yes, I do. Do you?"

Arno looked at him in confusion. Loki raised his hands and placed them on both sides of his head. Then he pushed his thumbs into Arno's eye sockets. Tony froze. Arno began trashing and screaming but there was no one to help him. The house was empty, Tony was too shocked to move. His heart was beating so fast it felt like it would bruise his ribs from the inside, Arno's screams ringed in his ears, his mouth felt dry, his head was spinning. He had no idea what he should do.

Loki dropped the dead man, when he turned, Tony saw his cheeks were tear-streaked. Tony stared at him in shock, at his bloodied hands, crazed eyes.

"Oh my god!" yelled a voice Tony hadn't heard for years. Pepper. Oh Pepper. Such bad timing.

Loki sobered up and glared at her. 

"Loki don't," Tony had finally found his voice and turned around to look at Pepper. "Hey, hey Potts, relax. I'm not gonna hurt you. Do you remember me? I'm-"

"Of course I remember you, Tony," she snapped even though she still seemed shocked. Oh, how he missed her. "I remember you killed Stane. I can now see you didn't want to stop with him."

"I- I didn't do that. I didn't kill Arno."

"No. You helped _him_ kill Arno," she started backing down, Loki suddenly appeared at Tony's back, ready to run after her if she started to escape.

"C'mon Potts, don't be stupid. You know me, I'm not a bad guy, do you remember that? I know you liked me."

She laughed bitterly at that, "What do you expect me to do, Tony? Just leave and pretend I didn’t see that?"

"Yes? Yes! That's actually a wonderful plan. We promise not to hurt you, right Loki?"

He turned around to look at Loki; he didn't look particularly pleased with the situation but not murderous either. Tony counted that as a win. 

"If it's that important to you, then no."

"See?"

"Are you insane?! What happened to you Tony?! You let him kill Arno! Arno, who had been good to you!"

And suddenly Tony heard white noise in his ears. Good to him. Huh. "Good to me?! Good to me?! Pepper I don't think you understand what I was to him. I was a pet. That's how we met, his parents wanted a nice, fully able kid to spend his whole days entertaining their sick kid. And when I turned out not to be meeting their standards they tossed me. But Arno liked me, so he kept e-mailing me when he was bored. The only thing I got from him was a job, which I would have gotten anyway because I am fucking brilliant. But no, he had to make a big deal about employing me at some mediocre position. He went out of his way to assure me all my hard work didn't matter because all the promotions I got were because he knew me. He knew, he knew what Stane tried to do and did nothing to help me. He made sure to publicly fire me thus making sure I would never get a job in the industry again. That's how Arno has been good to me, Potts."

"So this was revenge?"

"No. That was-"

"Yes. Yes it was," Loki said and strode towards Pepper, he loomed over her and put his bloodied hand on her cheek. She started to tremble. "You're quite an unfortunate witness Ms Potts."

"Loki, if you hurt her I swear to-"

"But Tony here doesn't want me to kill you. That would be a reasonable course of action, don't you think?"

"Please don't," Pepper whispered.

Loki tutted at her, "I won't if you promise me one thing."

"I won't tell anyone, I swear."

"Of course you won't."

Tony didn't have the time to sigh in relief before Loki abruptly spun her around and dragged her towards a window.

"Loki, no!"

"Relax Tony, I won't hurt her." He snatched a rope holding the curtains open and tied it around Pepper's hands, then he tied the other end of the rope to a bed leg. "See? She's fine."

Glass broke somewhere in the house. Tony had been dreading this would happen. Even though Jarvis had wiped clean all of their systems at the HUB they still had backups to which Tony had no access. Putting an alarm at Stark Mansion probably wasn't even a problem.

"SHIELD's here. It has to be them."

"He must have warned them."

"It doesn’t matter now. Let's go." Tony tugged Loki towards the exit. 

"I'll stall them. You go."

"That's not a good idea Loki. We can't just go out the front door you know, we shouldn't get separated."

"Then think of some other way to leave," Loki snapped at him.

"There is no other way to- Okay. Meet me on the roof. Be quick."

Tony took off without looking back, they’d see each other soon enough. 

* * *

He ran through numerous rooms of Stark Mansion with a pissed off Clint Barton breathing down his neck. 

"Smit you treacherous bastard! We have all exits covered, you're not going anywhere."

Tony ran into the late Howard Stark's office. There was no second exit. Shit. He hadn't thought of that. He turned around and powered up the blaster. When Barton ran out from behind the corner he fired. The man yelled and dodged the blast. Tony's repulsor started powering up again but before it could finish, Barton tackled Tony to the ground. They rolled on the floor, exchanging blows, until Tony finally got a hold of Barton's head and batted it against the floor. There was a sickening crunch and Barton's eyes lolled back. 

Tony stood up and looked around him. The last time he was in this office he’d been a little boy, terrified of the man sitting in front of him, but craving his approval like it was the only key to happiness. Tony probably had never been able to gain it, but as a kid he still had high hopes at satisfying his potential parents. It was bizarre, seeing decorations that once had seemed so large turn out to be just normal. The design didn't change much. Maybe except a giant model of what looked like a small town propped against one of the walls. Tony watched it curiously. There was something about the pattern that reminded him of the model of an element. He peered closer. Definitely an element, but none Tony had seen before. But it kind of... it could work, he realized. His heart started beating faster. Howard, you genius bastard.

He heard a shout from the other side of the house. Right. Now was not the time for scientific revelations. Tony ran out of the study and took the stairs up, taking them two at a time. When he stumbled onto the roof Loki was already there. Sitting cross-legged near the edge. He was soaked, since it had started raining sometime after they walked into the house. Tony kneeled next to him. He was trembling, his whole body was covered in blood, both human and his own.

"Loki?" Tony put his hair behind his ear and peered at his face.

Loki stared forward, there was something wrong with his eyes; it looked like he had two sets of irises, both of different colors. "I think it's time," he said in a broken voice.

"What? No. No no no. Not yet, Loki. Not yet."

Loki looked at him with his strange eyes and smiled gently. "It's okay. I quite like the setting."

Tony let out a choked laugh. Having a brief period of hope this wouldn't happen made it so much worse. He felt as if something was squeezing his heart with all its might, scratching at his insides, screaming in his head.

"It's a marvelous view, don't you think? I haven't seen anything more beautiful with my own eyes. With the eyes of others... I've seen things you wouldn’t believe. But with these…" he raised his hand and touched the skin right under his eye. A drop of a violet fluid flowed out of the corner of his eye and dissolved halfway down his cheek, "With these I've seen so little." He stretched his hand out and caressed Tony's cheek. "I'm happy to have met you."

"Of course you are."

Loki huffed and looked back at the view of the enclave, green and elegant, and the world behind it, dirty and chaotic. 

"I wish the life Odin had given me was real. Promise you'll tell my mother how little time she has left. Don't make her go into this unaware. Father won't tell her, but she deserves to know."

"I will, I promise I will," Tony sat down next to him so Loki could lean on him. 

"Good."

"Maybe we could-"

"It's time," Loki looked at him with sorrow in his eyes. 

"But it's too soon," he didn't care he sounded like a petulant child. It was. Too soon.

"Yes, it is. I had no chance to get enough of you," Loki smirked at him, as if they were at Tony's workshop again, sitting on a couch and flirting. 

Tony stretched his neck and kissed him chastely, "I know the feeling."

Loki tore his eyes away and looked up to the sky. Tony almost didn't see the tears that flowed from his eyes due to the pouring rain. But he knew they were there. They sat there, leaning on each other, soaked. 

Suddenly Loki gasped and grabbed Tony's arm.

"Loki?"

But there was no response. Tony caught his body before it slid to the ground and laid it gently on the roof. There were sounds of steps coming from the stairs. It was time he left. He closed Loki's eyes and pushed his hair back from his face. He knew this would happen. It didn't change the fact that it hurt so damn much.

He activated the thrusters and flew away just as Rogers barreled onto the roof.

Frigga looked at him steely. She hadn't said a word after she left him into the house.

"I am sorry for your loss, ma'am."

She said nothing to him, but if possible her stare hardened.

"I am here because there's something you need to know. Loki asked me to... Replicants, the nexus line, Loki's line. They have limited life span. Four years. Not a day more. It's- It's irreversible."

"Oh," her gaze softened. "I... Thank you for telling me."

Tony nodded. "Thought you would want to know that."

"He did not waste his limited time."

Tony shook his head and avoided looking at her.

"So should you, and so will I."

"I will," he said solemnly and thought about the new element model that kept surfacing in his thoughts. He most certainly will.


End file.
